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Norfolk is the only county in the UK without any confirmed cases of coronavirus The total lack of transport links to the rest of the UK is finally paying off

Jessica Barnard (@JessicaLBarnard)Wed, 11 Mar 2020 23:59 GMT

https://twitter.com/matteocollina/status/1237845042317819905

Reminds me of a (supposed) Russian adage: The church is near, but the road is icy. The pub is far, but I’ll be careful.

Tim Keating (@mrtact)Thu, 12 Mar 2020 00:47 GMT

The Office: Coronavirus Michael ignores the “work from home” memo because he thinks that everyone should be together at a time like this Dwight acts completely normal & claims genetic immunity Angela wears a hazmat suit Kevin says that he’s had it for weeks & feels fine

Daniel Burnell (@the_real_bnell)Mon, 09 Mar 2020 23:55 GMT

https://twitter.com/the_real_bnell/status/1237165265604968448

Creed is somehow Patient Zero Stanley is on a beach with a margarita as a video conference begins Andy looked at WebMD & is now losing his mind The episode ends with Michael shopping alone at Costco on a Saturday. He’s excited because he usually “can’t even get in the door”

Daniel Burnell (@the_real_bnell)Tue, 10 Mar 2020 00:17 GMT

Hey techfolk: We need to talk about social distancing, remote work, streaming media and Internet bandwidth. Because we‘re right on the cusp of a major ancillary coronavirus problem: Bottlenecking and Internet access issues.

Jeff Yang (@originalspin)Wed, 11 Mar 2020 17:56 GMT

https://twitter.com/ChuckWendig/status/1237902555843346432

Professor Umbridge: Because she is the epitome of the system that’s meant to protect everyone, harming with government approval. Plans for the common good being subverted for personal benefit. How it can all be turned on it’s ear by people who think they are doing right.

Melissa Fetterman (@Melissa_mf790)Thu, 12 Mar 2020 01:01 GMT

https://twitter.com/ChuckWendig/status/1237902555843346432

Killmonger, because he was right.

Davids and Dragons (@davids_and)Thu, 12 Mar 2020 00:49 GMT

The World Health Organization (WHO) announced that dogs cannot get Covid-19. Dogs can be released from quarantine. I guess you could say that "WHO let the dogs out" who.int/emergencies/di… #dadjokes

Sam Geraci (@AmFamSamGeraci)Wed, 11 Mar 2020 16:53 GMT

THE TAMPON TAX HAS OFFICIALLY BEEN ABOLISHED!!! From January 2021, there will be no more VAT on women’s sanitary products, in line with the VAT policy on other life essentials! #Budget2020

Lola (@AdultingByLola)Wed, 11 Mar 2020 14:13 GMT

Ya'll are gonna eat all your quarantine snacks in one night.

Octavia Butler knew... (@NotNikyatu)Thu, 12 Mar 2020 01:05 GMT

if your dog stretches and you dont say "OH BIG STRETCH" every single time then you are a psychopath and i dont want to know you

Andrew Lawrence (@ndrew_lawrence)Wed, 11 Mar 2020 02:44 GMT

So did Trump really just cancel travel TO Europe as well as from? Because if so I’m stranded in the US for 30 days...

Emma Bostian 🐞 (@EmmaBostian)Thu, 12 Mar 2020 01:42 GMT

If I already have my personal accounts all in @monzo and then move my business account there does that mean #FullFullMonzo ?

Richard Bagshaw (@bagwaa)Wed, 11 Mar 2020 09:49 GMT

All of my Microsoft friends are posting photos of their home offices, so I thought I would join in the fun.

Honest MVP (@HonestMvp)Tue, 10 Mar 2020 10:04 GMT

<puts on my surgical mask, deepens voice> Ah, you think social distancing is your ally? You merely adopted social distancing. I was born in it, molded by it. I didn't gain social skills until I was already an adult, by then it was nothing to me but sensory overload!

Kelly Shortridge (@swagitda_)Wed, 11 Mar 2020 13:57 GMT

🚀 The world is abuzz on #RemoteWork, and @gitlab just launched its Remote Work Report. 🌏 So much great data! Plus, a key stereotype is busted — not all remote workers are Insta-famous digital nomads. Most of us just want autonomy, trust, and freedom. 😎 about.gitlab.com/remote-work-re…

Darren Murph (@darrenmurph)Wed, 11 Mar 2020 00:11 GMT

I just had this epiphany: I should totally get my nails done to match my website theme - the dark one obvs 💅

Carol ⚡️ (@CarolSaysThings)Wed, 11 Mar 2020 11:15 GMT

WHO let the pandemic out

Holly Brockwell (@holly)Wed, 11 Mar 2020 16:48 GMT

RT @emmadmazhari someone at zoom build a feature where the call immediately ends as soon as the first person says "bye"

Carol ⚡️ (@CarolSaysThings)Wed, 11 Mar 2020 07:33 GMT

https://twitter.com/EmilyKager/status/1237607424678215680

Ending the patriarchy one sassy DM at a time 💅

Emily Kager (@EmilyKager)Wed, 11 Mar 2020 05:26 GMT

https://twitter.com/_tessr/status/1237489998963912707

under Berlin's heavily pro-tenant laws, that means the dining table is legally yours now

Aditya Mukerjee, the 🦦-ific 🏳️‍🌈 (@chimeracoder)Tue, 10 Mar 2020 21:27 GMT

people are WFH and posting insta stories of their partners with captions like, "my new coworker! 😍😍😍" which is very sweet and all that but personally, I have laid my extra-clicky mechanical keyboard across the dining table in a display of dominance

Tess Rinearson (@_tessr)Tue, 10 Mar 2020 21:26 GMT

It's VR Jenga but your fingers get longer after every move. You in?

Daniel Beauchamp (@pushmatrix)Tue, 10 Mar 2020 13:43 GMT

2020 in a nutshell

Randall Otis (@RandallOtisTV)Tue, 10 Mar 2020 15:58 GMT

I finally finished the MVP of my #IndieWeb RSVPs! I’m now ofish attending #IndieWebCamp and I’m very excited for it 😄 Thanks @JamieTanna for all the help ✨

Carol ⚡️ (@CarolSaysThings)Tue, 10 Mar 2020 20:24 GMT

Bottom left is the face of a cat who has realised she's made a terrible mistake.

Emma Seward (@MrsEmma)Tue, 10 Mar 2020 15:33 GMT

Catto finished he dindin 😍🥰

Daryl Cecile 🐼 (@darylcecile)Mon, 09 Mar 2020 20:39 GMT

✨ Execute any command in a GitHub Issue comment with GitHub Actions and github.com/nwtgck/actions…

Max Schoening (@mschoening)Mon, 09 Mar 2020 17:54 GMT

Elizabeth Warren: I have a plan for everything. America: Well, I didn't vote for you. Elizabeth Warren: Fu*k it, gonna have some fun dancin' on SNL for 5 minutes. America: Elizabeth Warren should stop dancing & save the country. Who does she think she is?

Charis Hill ♿ (@BeingCharisBlog)Sun, 08 Mar 2020 17:30 GMT

lol remember when 2020 was going pretty well until literally 72 hours in we were brought to the brink of war with Iran and then the entire continent of Australia was engulfed in flames and then a viral pandemic swept across the planet and then global markets collapsed?

Brian Tyler Cohen (@briantylercohen)Mon, 09 Mar 2020 21:17 GMT

crap this virus is turning all the people into pigeons #coronavirus

ari (@__ariannalp)Sun, 08 Mar 2020 19:00 GMT

RT @SamSykesSwears communicating with people on twitter dot com:

Carol ⚡️ (@CarolSaysThings)Tue, 10 Mar 2020 07:46 GMT

Oh my god, the doctors and nurses at Bernie's Coronavirus town hall are PISSED at the media question they just got. They got asked how the United States can pay for free vaccines, and the panel turned it around and said that no one asks how we can afford endless wars.

Wes 11 Pro Max 🏳️‍🌈🌹 (@WesHagerman)Mon, 09 Mar 2020 20:38 GMT

working from home day 1: my husband just army-crawled through the dining room to stay out of frame of my zoom call

amy (@arb)Mon, 09 Mar 2020 19:31 GMT

The thing with providing lots of free content (via my blog & github), is that the expectation is now created elsewhere too. The downside of open source/free content ...

Mattias Geniar (@mattiasgeniar)Tue, 10 Mar 2020 07:07 GMT

Lovely to see @rem and @adactio at Tech Nottingham, detailing the formation of web protocols and how they helped recreate the first browser. adactio.com/journal/14821

Simon Collison (@colly)Mon, 09 Mar 2020 20:37 GMT

https://twitter.com/pete_codes/status/1237091274085347328

Ugh. Stand still you flappy arse

Andrew Seward (@MrAndrew)Tue, 10 Mar 2020 00:04 GMT

Official announcement: I would like to apologise for launching a series of low-cost education conferences around the world that no one has to go to. Misguidedly I thought this would be a good thing, but I now understand that this was, somehow, an act of oppression.

Tom Bennett (@tombennett71)Mon, 09 Mar 2020 08:18 GMT

Interviewer: Why do you want to work for Facebook? Me: I'm keen on protecting people's data and want them to have a good user experience Interviewer: Me: Interviewer: Me: haha I'm joking I don't give a shit Interviewer: haha omg I was like whaaatttt lmao

Jon (@ArfMeasures)Mon, 09 Mar 2020 15:52 GMT

When you get home late from an event and your partner has made Mexican food ✨

Carol ⚡️ (@CarolSaysThings)Mon, 09 Mar 2020 23:31 GMT

Why do boring old white dudes keep getting promoted into my timeline. Fuck off I get enough of you IRL already.

Elsa (@marmaladegirl)Mon, 09 Mar 2020 19:09 GMT

Kate (@SBinLondon)Mon, 09 Mar 2020 15:01 GMT

that completely normal lunch, "a bell pepper"

Lauren L Walker (@LLW902)Sun, 08 Mar 2020 12:57 GMT