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I'm buying this
Out of Context Pokemon (@OoCPokemon)Fri, 27 Nov 2020 00:24 GMT
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And yet a bunch of colonizers spreading a virus before eating a ton of food is probably the most historically-consistent version of Thanksgiving that we've done.
Kristen Seversky (@KR1573N)Wed, 25 Nov 2020 06:30 GMT
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everybody in America thinks they could one day become a billionaire but nobody thinks they could get covid
ellory smith (@ellorysmith)Wed, 25 Nov 2020 18:47 GMT
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💀
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Story of my life:
Daniel Salinas Córdova (@DanielSalinas00)Wed, 25 Nov 2020 10:54 GMT
rizwana akmal khan (@rizbizkits)Thu, 26 Nov 2020 11:11 GMT
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My fucking doorbell doesn't work because AWS us-east-1 is having issues 🤦🏿♂️
SJP (ಠ_ಠ) (@SJP1804)Wed, 25 Nov 2020 16:58 GMT
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I don't want kids, never have, and was gutted when I found out I was pregnant a few years back. The miscarriage I went on to have was ABSOLUTELY devastating, so I can't even imagine how it feels when the baby was deeply wanted. Be kind, please.Holly Brockwell (@holly)Wed, 25 Nov 2020 22:28 GMT
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Next week's keynote will feature no new @awscloud services, they'll just turn us-east-1 back on. #reInventCorey Quinn (@QuinnyPig)Wed, 25 Nov 2020 22:55 GMT
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Welcome to the future
Dare Obasanjo (@Carnage4Life)Wed, 25 Nov 2020 21:14 GMT
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Meghan Markle won't see the all of the nasty shit you write about her but your friends who have experienced miscarriages and the loss of a baby will.
Paisley Thomson (@PaisleyThomson)Wed, 25 Nov 2020 13:25 GMT
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I was tempted too 🤶 twitter.com/sarahspain/sta…Post details
I'm tempted, y'all...
Sarah Spain (@SarahSpain)Tue, 24 Nov 2020 22:46 GMT
Farrah (@FarrahC32)Tue, 24 Nov 2020 23:48 GMT
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BREAKING: Vaccinations will start on December 9 in Nottingham and Notts if vaccine(s) approved, health boss says. Full story on its way
Kit Sandeman (@SandemanKit)Tue, 24 Nov 2020 14:40 GMT
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the closer it gets to xmas, the more difficult it's proving to feel angrier and angrier about this. Pardon me whilst i evaporate into a mist of annoyance ✌
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I still cannot believe Boris Johnson closed the country down at 9:16pm the night before eid yet is proposing a mix of four households for Christmas four weeks in advance ??? Can you even imagine if this was the other way round the UK would be absolutely FURIOUS
al 🧚🏼♀️ (@alicef1811)Mon, 23 Nov 2020 16:42 GMT
rizwana akmal khan (@rizbizkits)Tue, 24 Nov 2020 20:50 GMT
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🇺🇸 🖥 uncle odil🗽 ✝️ (@OdiliTime)Mon, 23 Nov 2020 07:37 GMT
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Oh my god I just won an iPhone 11 from work. What a god tier day.
Andrew (@Chagrilled)Tue, 24 Nov 2020 16:39 GMT
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“You can’t stop the work.” Season 6 is a go.The Expanse (@ExpanseOnPrime)Tue, 24 Nov 2020 17:00 GMT
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The Winter Express is pulling back into the station for the return of Holo-Day Bash! Join the festivities Dec 1. 🚂❄
Apex Legends (@PlayApex)Tue, 24 Nov 2020 16:03 GMT
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My management style consists mostly of telling folks to delete Teams from their phones and go away when on vacation
Scott Hanselman (@shanselman)Mon, 23 Nov 2020 21:24 GMT
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£29 million for a Festival of Brexit. Hmmm. Remind me again, how much did the government need to spend in order to ensure impoverished children had enough food? £24 million was it? Interesting. Did I say ‘interesting’? I meant to say ‘What a bunch of cunts.’
Jonathan Pie (@JonathanPieNews)Tue, 24 Nov 2020 10:46 GMT
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WholesomeMemes (@WholesomeMeme)Tue, 24 Nov 2020 01:08 GMT
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Wait for it. can’t. stop. laughing...🤣😭🤣Rex Chapman🏇🏼 (@RexChapman)Mon, 23 Nov 2020 03:41 GMT
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For some reason when people see my shell prompt they get really mad
Randall Munroe (@xkcd)Mon, 23 Nov 2020 21:05 GMT
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I'd like to apologize to everyone for creating a nationwide potato shortage by ordering a "small" side of fries at Five Guys.
H̶͢͝T̨T̸̕͢P̴̕͠ ̕͠Lo̡͡v̸̷͢è̡͢ç̶raf̕t̨͜ (@HTTP_Lovecraft)Mon, 23 Nov 2020 21:40 GMT
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the only good thing I saw on the Internet today
Russy KGB (@RussellHFilm)Mon, 23 Nov 2020 03:16 GMT
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With the return of Rule of 6.. at least this will be easier to remember this year: Partridge in a pear tree 2 turtle doves 3 French Hens 4 Calling birds 5 GOOLD RIIINGS 6 Geese a laying 6 Swans swimming 6 Maids milking 6 drummers drumming 6 pipers piping 6 lords leapingHarvey Hawkins (@harvhawkscomedy)Mon, 23 Nov 2020 16:51 GMT
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chasing after a ping pong ball is wildly dehumanizing
cass (@cassthevirgin)Sun, 22 Nov 2020 19:48 GMT
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Why you should have a cat (@ShouldHaveCat)Sun, 22 Nov 2020 19:35 GMT
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listening to mando trying to explain the red vs blue wire to not baby yoda gives me anxiety filled flashbacks from my tech support days.
Whitney Champion 🍪 (@shortxstack)Sun, 22 Nov 2020 03:31 GMT
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This Thursday we have a talk by @edent “The (connected) house of horrors” ! We fill our homes, life and bodies with internet connected devices. But do we really understand the dangers which lurk inside them?HackSoc Nottingham (@hacksocnotts)Sat, 21 Nov 2020 15:43 GMT
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The best bit is that this is a completely anonymised subtweet because this is EVERY tech CEO’s marketing plan
Joe (@jna_sh)Sun, 22 Nov 2020 14:49 GMT
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Shout out to the worst 6 months of my professional life where a CEO relentlessly ground down a team of talented people because his “marketing plan” was to get #1 on Hacker News twitter.com/jasminexeth/st…Post details
I don’t know who needs to hear this but...... “You don’t need to go viral. You need a marketing plan...”A Tech Head 🌎 (@jasminexETH)Thu, 29 Oct 2020 14:26 GMT
Joe (@jna_sh)Sun, 22 Nov 2020 14:46 GMT
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HE DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO CLEAN HIMSELFWhy you should have a cat (@ShouldHaveCat)Sat, 21 Nov 2020 22:42 GMT
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Adjusted the #elePHPant display so they’re on top of Hylas’ tank!Matt Brunt (@Brunty)Sun, 22 Nov 2020 13:53 GMT
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“we have guests go get the fancy cups”
sam (@Celona100k)Fri, 20 Nov 2020 22:28 GMT
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Seeing a guy for 4 months, found out tonight he has a girlfriend of 10 years and a 7 years old kid (that I didn’t know about), bearing in mind he’s taken me to meet his mum 3 times and SHE KNEW AND LIED TO ME TOO, you couldn’t fucking write my life
Abi (@AbigailSwift2)Fri, 20 Nov 2020 20:50 GMT
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today i offer you two cats in pants
eʀɪᴄᴋᴀ (@Erickajamon)Sat, 21 Nov 2020 17:03 GMT
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The only two cat personalities that exist
Animals Being Jerks (@MeanAnimals)Sat, 21 Nov 2020 20:05 GMT
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You clearly needed a cat video 😽
Sasha Rosenbaum (@DivineOps)Sun, 22 Nov 2020 04:17 GMT
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if you knew me before my 20s, you never actually knew me. you knew season 1 me. we were severely underfunded and the writing team was going through a lot.
Audrey Porne (@AudreyPorne)Sun, 22 Nov 2020 01:18 GMT
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People keep asking me how I went from 143 followers to 150 in just 6 months. Let me tell you it has been a journey. A thread 👇Steve Lamar (@StevejLamar)Sat, 21 Nov 2020 13:09 GMT
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Christmas is so important to me. My family is so important to me. December the 25th is … not important. We'll celebrate on Dec 25th via video if necessary and will have Christmas in person on whatever date it is safe to do so.Louise Paling (@short_louise)Sat, 21 Nov 2020 17:28 GMT
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SPIDER-CAT
Matt Brunt (@Brunty)Sat, 21 Nov 2020 17:20 GMT
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🎶do you see what i see?🎶 twitter.com/bymikebaker/st…Post details
Good morning. Here's an endless-loop gallery of A.I.-generated people. There's a lot more to explore in this interactive article, which is one of the most remarkable pieces of digital journalism I've ever seen: nytimes.com/interactive/20…Mike Baker (@ByMikeBaker)Sat, 21 Nov 2020 16:21 GMT
EricaJoy (@EricaJoy)Sat, 21 Nov 2020 16:43 GMT
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Oh no why did the timeline tell me about @BigTechAlert, I am not responsible enough to handle this amount of visible CEO pettiness. Relatedly, I guess the GitHub acquisition is truly complete now Satya has dumped the ex-CEO for the brand account 😂Joe (@jna_sh)Sat, 21 Nov 2020 09:27 GMT
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RT @prafxis the original "fleet" was when you get a glimpse of a good tweet on your timeline and then it gets auto-refreshed out of existenceCarol 🌻 (@CarolSaysThings)Sat, 21 Nov 2020 13:27 GMT
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My husband asked me if I wanted hot chocolate and then he brought me this 😍
Ashley Willis (McNamara) (@ashleymcnamara)Sat, 21 Nov 2020 03:35 GMT




















