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What you mean speechless son go suit up twitter.com/chrisevans/sta…

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I’m speechless

Chris Evans (@ChrisEvans)Wed, 06 Jan 2021 20:56 GMT

Jeremiah 🌞 (@GBEJinero)Wed, 06 Jan 2021 21:09 GMT

Absolutely losing it over the fact folks think this asshole’s name is “Via Getty”

Nerd Girl Says (@Rachael_Conrad)Thu, 07 Jan 2021 01:10 GMT

“hmm i wonder if they planned this”

avery 💫 (@SUNSETSAPPHICS)Thu, 07 Jan 2021 01:00 GMT

Hi! I’m a recruiter from Facebook. Would you like to join us building the #1 tool domestic terrorists used to coordinate an attack on our nation’s capitol?

Alex Manthei (@xoalexo)Wed, 06 Jan 2021 21:29 GMT

Yep, this is the one. This is the tweet. twitter.com/11thhour/statu…

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Day 1 vs. Day 1,448

11th Hour (@11thHour)Wed, 06 Jan 2021 23:14 GMT

Luke Exton (@LukeExton)Thu, 07 Jan 2021 00:07 GMT

🙈 omfg our country. I want to work at Coinbase just for today so I don't have to deal with what's going on.

Sara Mauskopf (@sm)Wed, 06 Jan 2021 20:09 GMT

Whenever I see a substack, I just can't not think that people learned nothing from what happened with Medium

Joe (@jna_sh)Wed, 06 Jan 2021 11:44 GMT

I’m getting back onto RSS, after failing to keep up with things on Twitter for too long 😅 So please send me your favourite blogs that have an RSS feed, so I can party like it’s 2006 🥳

Carol 🌻 (@CarolSaysThings)Wed, 06 Jan 2021 09:52 GMT

fetishization is literally still racism

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a disease

carpet muncher🧃 (@lesfemmefataIe)Sun, 03 Jan 2021 22:42 GMT

rain (@internetfairy)Mon, 04 Jan 2021 17:27 GMT

OH: “I shouldn’t have to fix other people’s tests” shout people too incompetent to fix other people’s tests

Kent Beck (@KentBeck)Tue, 05 Jan 2021 04:29 GMT

Matt Hancock has just told MPs that nurseries are being kept open because they are private and “would otherwise go bust”. The Health Secretary should not be making public health decisions based on private profit.

Nadia Whittome MP (@NadiaWhittomeMP)Tue, 05 Jan 2021 10:40 GMT

You know what would’ve been really great for school kids right now? Universal free broadband.

Nadia Whittome MP (@NadiaWhittomeMP)Tue, 05 Jan 2021 09:34 GMT

This morning my gynecologist introduced herself by telling me her pronouns and asking me mine and when getting my medical history asked if I had sex with sperm producing partners. This is the future liberals want

Sally Tamarkin (@sallyt)Mon, 04 Jan 2021 16:51 GMT

"doesn't he look tired?" twitter.com/search?q=%22do…

Stuart Langridge (@sil)Mon, 04 Jan 2021 21:02 GMT

WOAH BLACK BETTY

Darren Dutton (@Darren_Dutton)Mon, 04 Jan 2021 21:53 GMT

https://twitter.com/freezydorito/status/1346384434648539136

laura bananas (@freezydorito)Tue, 05 Jan 2021 09:18 GMT

https://twitter.com/HardDriveMag/status/1346094058767265793

pelican food | maclunkey (@cleveru16605923)Mon, 04 Jan 2021 14:05 GMT

https://twitter.com/joncstone/status/1346217230221123586

Eat Out To Help Out cost £849m in total... you could buy all 1.4 million kids elegible for free school meals a £400 Chromebook and 12 months of £20-a-month broadband for roughly the same amount of money (£896m). Might have been a better investment over the summer

Jon Stone (@joncstone)Mon, 04 Jan 2021 22:23 GMT

This is the best meme ever 😭😂🤣

i am groot🚀 (@astrotoya)Mon, 04 Jan 2021 18:53 GMT

https://twitter.com/mbbroberg/status/1346199894793584642

Find your most frequent command line typo and use that. This will teach you to type more precisely.

Corey Quinn (@QuinnyPig)Mon, 04 Jan 2021 21:07 GMT

New year, new challenges and for me: a new job. I'm a Developer Advocate for @aiven_io so if you like data, clouds or open source then keep an eye on what I'm up to. Wishing everyone a happy and healthy 2021 whether your challenges are old or new :)

Lorna Mitchell (@lornajane)Mon, 04 Jan 2021 15:03 GMT

boris johnson appearing on tv this week to tell us we can have a national lockdown OR spin the wheel for a chance to see what measures are behind the door with question marks painted on it

laura bananas (@freezydorito)Mon, 04 Jan 2021 14:04 GMT

I'm elated to (finally) announce – I've joined ▲ @vercel Today was my first day as part of this incredibly talented team and my astonishment/delight/awe at this possibly life-changing opportunity requires way more than 280 characters! 🚀😌

rizwana akmal khan (@rizbizkits)Mon, 04 Jan 2021 20:00 GMT

https://twitter.com/ShantunR/status/1346139799829278721

Your "personal experience" is absolutely not relevant to the lived experiences of the actual women agreeing with her. Also, calling us "girls" is not correct. We're grown-ass women, not children.

Kat Cosgrove, Allegedly (@Dixie3Flatline)Mon, 04 Jan 2021 20:13 GMT

jk rowling be like ‘there’s about to be more national lockdowns than genders’

laura bananas (@freezydorito)Mon, 04 Jan 2021 19:49 GMT

Congratulations to Mr Brian Pinker, who has received 100,000,000 doses of the jab.

Just Pengy 🐧 (@IncognitoPengy)Mon, 04 Jan 2021 11:18 GMT

I made the mistake of telling Thom I wanted to exercise after work this year. Today I finished work and turned on the PS and he came running to tell me to do yoga. I did it and now I feel great ☹️

Carol 🌻 (@CarolSaysThings)Mon, 04 Jan 2021 16:48 GMT

every man I talk to on tinder when they want to meet straight away and I mention the pandemic

three steaks pam (@alexandrakuri)Sun, 03 Jan 2021 23:13 GMT

https://twitter.com/Kate_Bradbury/status/1346066297780662273

Brilliant article, and will ring true for many. I'm seriously thinking about communal living with friends at some point in the future - I think retirement in a shared house, pooling resources and time and friendship sounds delightful 💛

Emma Seward (@MrsEmma)Mon, 04 Jan 2021 12:15 GMT

We made this video for my cousin's remote I'm A Celeb themed 40th birthday party 😀 It helps if you know #BykerGrove - a kids TV show Ant and Dec did in the 90s & if you just turned 40 you DEFINITELY remember 😂 youtu.be/qZR2d1pl3dU #PaintballBlindness #NeverForgiveGemma

Andrew Seward (@MrAndrew)Mon, 04 Jan 2021 11:13 GMT

when you look over his shoulder and it be ya own ass at 600% zoom

Bhoka (@boop)Sun, 03 Jan 2021 18:09 GMT

https://twitter.com/CarolSaysThings/status/1345785282256396288

'be accepting of when things don't go to plan' for life motto 💛 thank you for writing; in an year that's robbed us of sustained irl chatter, a look back (no matter how awful the times were) feels like a happy encounter.

rizwana akmal khan (@rizbizkits)Sun, 03 Jan 2021 22:21 GMT

https://twitter.com/hollyhopkins_/status/1345554171597115393

Hi 🙋‍♀️ thanks for sharing my home 😒

House_No_61_ (@House61)Sun, 03 Jan 2021 19:39 GMT

https://twitter.com/hollyhopkins_/status/1345554171597115393

Personally think if you buy a house you should entitled to make it into whatever YOU like, not everyone is going to have the same taste

emma freeman (@emlf_x)Sun, 03 Jan 2021 16:36 GMT

The Expanse No Context (@ExpanseNContext)Sun, 03 Jan 2021 20:42 GMT

Men will literally live in a moving castle and transform into a giant bird instead of going to therapy

Abraham Riesman אברהם ריסמאַן (@abrahamjoseph)Sat, 02 Jan 2021 13:51 GMT

https://twitter.com/lynncyrin/status/1345549848615915521

I'm an autistic coach. I'm taking on very few new clients at the moment but please dm me to see if I can help you. If I can't I can pass you to someone I know and trust. Thanks @JamieTanna

Rachel Morgan-Trimmer (@SparkleClass)Sun, 03 Jan 2021 13:20 GMT

"Let's call the cops just in case." —Karen Kat

Mallory Brewer (@malwaaare)Sat, 02 Jan 2021 20:28 GMT

Help! My (27M) commits (abef8c, 94a6cb, 39d30c, 51afee, 34c392) have unionized with a squash and rebase.

i can fix my mistakes don't give me solutions (@mgattozzi)Sat, 02 Jan 2021 23:32 GMT

laura bananas (@freezydorito)Sun, 03 Jan 2021 12:17 GMT

in england, they don't say i'll kick your ass, they say i'll see you on the

reni (@reniadeb)Sat, 02 Jan 2021 15:18 GMT

I've been laughing for 10 minutes.

Fiqah (@sassycrass)Sat, 02 Jan 2021 06:33 GMT

me liking horny tweets knowing twitter will absolutely make sure one of my coworkers sees it

bletchley punk (@alicegoldfuss)Sat, 02 Jan 2021 22:22 GMT