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I'm in a meeting where they just used "what do you miss most about pre-COVID life" as an ICEBREAKER PROMPT!! DO NOT DO THIS!

Devon Price (@drdevonprice)Mon, 15 Feb 2021 22:06 GMT

Shoutout to all of the people sending emails asking women to do things for international women’s month activities when we don’t hear a peep from them the other 11 months.

Abby Fuller (@abbyfuller)Tue, 16 Feb 2021 00:51 GMT

It's only open source if it comes from the libre region of France. Otherwise it's just sparkling shareware.

ᴊᴀᴍᴇꜱ ᴊᴜꜱᴛ ᴊᴀᴍᴇꜱ (@purpleidea)Mon, 15 Feb 2021 17:55 GMT

caption is “POV you interview with silicon valley’s hot new tech startup” and wow if i don’t feel this in my bones

jess (@jessfromonline)Mon, 15 Feb 2021 16:00 GMT

are facebook evil? well, they've been instrumental in the rise of fascism across the world and they profit off right-wing violence, but also they made graphql, so who's to say

Kat Maddox (@ctrlshifti)Mon, 15 Feb 2021 21:13 GMT

A coworker sent me this, I am BLESSED

Alex Arrelia (@AlexArrelia)Sat, 13 Feb 2021 21:42 GMT

I’ve choked on tears while watching patients say goodbye to their loved ones via an iPad.

Dr Rosena Allin-Khan 💙 (@DrRosena)Sun, 14 Feb 2021 12:58 GMT

https://t.co/MdlzuH6J11

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Growing up I never thought I would be in this job (mainly because I wanted to be a Jedi). I'm honoured that on this day last year the PM asked me to serve as Chancellor. It's been incredibly tough but thank you to everyone who has supported me along the way.

Rishi Sunak (@RishiSunak)Sat, 13 Feb 2021 09:47 GMT

jess✨ (@jesswxyz)Sat, 13 Feb 2021 10:25 GMT

You can break into the United States Capitol, threaten to murder its leaders, kills its police officers and get a pat on the back from Republican Senators. BUT if you enter the United States at the age of 4, not knowing what’s going on, you will be punished forever. 😔

Astrid Silva (@Astrid_NV)Sat, 13 Feb 2021 21:04 GMT

https://twitter.com/NeilNawaz/status/1358526947723268096

--- -. . ..-. .- .. - .... .-.. --- ...- . (@onefaithlove)Sun, 07 Feb 2021 21:51 GMT

Feb 2020 February 2021

alex (@alex_abads)Sat, 13 Feb 2021 13:04 GMT

Galaxy Brain on this guy! His @exercism_io solution to "Leap" on the TypeScript track is 🧑‍🍳💋! Focus on *what* and not *how*, love it!

Colin DeCarlo (@colindecarlo)Sat, 13 Feb 2021 15:52 GMT

Star Trek Minus Context (@NoContextTrek)Sat, 13 Feb 2021 15:52 GMT

I’ve consulted every person I know and their therapists so I can conclusively say this is A Big Week for breakdowns

*:･ﾟ✧ Samantha ✧･ﾟ:* (@samantha_gold)Thu, 11 Feb 2021 21:42 GMT

Normal Conversation xkcd.com/2424

Randall Munroe (@xkcd)Sat, 13 Feb 2021 05:08 GMT

filling out performance reviews like

dipa (@dipalua_)Thu, 11 Feb 2021 20:10 GMT

TW: miscarriage At 5 weeks we found out we were pregnant. At 10 weeks I am currently having an excruciating miscarriage. Miscarriage is often endured in silence which is why I’m posting this. If you’ve had a miscarriage you’re not alone. It will take time, but I will be okay.

Emma Bostian 🐞 (@EmmaBostian)Fri, 12 Feb 2021 15:28 GMT

being promoted is always a double edged sword, but at least it generally means you get more spreadsheets to play with

Gareth Rushgrove (@garethr)Fri, 12 Feb 2021 08:29 GMT

#brooklyn99 but it comes back will be the in 2021! last season

mimi (@hauntedamie)Thu, 11 Feb 2021 20:48 GMT

We're coming up on a year of being in this pandemic, there's some sort of weird existential dread hitting a lot of us. The bad news: we're all in this at the same time, together. The good news: we're all in this at the same time, together.

Sarah Drasner (@sarah_edo)Fri, 12 Feb 2021 00:30 GMT

So just to confirm, this is the worst anyone's felt since the start of the pandemic, right? Like it's not just me?

Human Mel (@melhuman)Thu, 11 Feb 2021 15:11 GMT

sorry for not keeping in touch. i have literally nothing to say

marianne eloise (@marianne_eloise)Thu, 11 Feb 2021 13:14 GMT

*phew* so glad tomorrow is finally friday :)

Rebecca Black (@MsRebeccaBlack)Thu, 11 Feb 2021 05:45 GMT

stop buying into parasocial relationships with ladies on here, and stop trying to form them with your followers. i enjoy chatting with you all but we are mostly all strangers and we should keep that in mind before forming attachments. i like your jokes, that's it.

KELGORE (@KelgoreTrout)Wed, 10 Feb 2021 20:19 GMT

PRO TIP FOR PEOPLE STRUGGLING WITH ANXIETY: I have found it very beneficial to my mental health, especially my anxiety, to not be in a pandemic

Cilantro.bb.95@aim.com (@bb_apes)Mon, 08 Feb 2021 06:04 GMT

"There seems to be some kind of filter on here Lord Vader. I'm here live, I'm not a cat."

Mengel Miniatures (@MengelMinis)Wed, 10 Feb 2021 00:49 GMT

The internet is so fast.

Jay Kuo (@nycjayjay)Wed, 10 Feb 2021 04:04 GMT

Mood @AOC

Daniel Golson (@dsgolson)Wed, 10 Feb 2021 05:25 GMT

>see's "Tron" trending >get happy for a moment >fortnite skin and crossover >pain

Continue (@321Continue)Wed, 10 Feb 2021 14:29 GMT

Working in social media means explaining to your partner, who's never been on twitter in his life, why you're spooning beans onto two pairs of glasses at 9pm on a Tuesday twitter.com/specsavers/sta…

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If you can’t beat them, join them... @HeinzUK @Weetabix

Specsavers (@Specsavers)Tue, 09 Feb 2021 21:09 GMT

Helen. (@HelenGradwell)Tue, 09 Feb 2021 21:15 GMT

“I’m here live, I’m not a cat,” says lawyer after Zoom filter mishap “I can see that,” responds judge

Lawrence Hurley (@lawrencehurley)Tue, 09 Feb 2021 18:26 GMT

https://twitter.com/Bryan80865972/status/1359137732874805249

The fucking irony

"SOSA CHAMBERLAIN" (@LVShepherd)Tue, 09 Feb 2021 15:32 GMT

This comment on a ted talk im watching

malaya (@accessforbidden)Sun, 07 Feb 2021 13:13 GMT

me: “would you rather fart loudly or poop yourself silently” recruiter: “we meant questions about the job”

Andy Bell (@piccalilli_)Mon, 08 Feb 2021 12:14 GMT

Pls someone explain why so many signatures need "witnessed" and posted with a wet signature when buying a house? Holy god, this process is the most archaic process I've ever had to deal with. And I used to be a public sector software eng- so that's really saying something!

Sheree Atcheson (@nirushika)Mon, 08 Feb 2021 10:08 GMT

Uber Eats just spent $5.5 million plus whatever it cost to get Cardi B, Mike Meyers and Dana Carvey to tell us to "support local restaurants" while putting local restaurants out of business by charging them 30% delivery fees.

Dan Price (@DanPriceSeattle)Mon, 08 Feb 2021 01:54 GMT

Serena Williams has 23 Grand Slam titles. twitter.com/dontestallwort…

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so Jordan has 6 rings, and Brady has 7 rings. is it now safe to say that Brady is the GOAT of all GOATS?

Donté Stallworth (@DonteStallworth)Mon, 08 Feb 2021 03:25 GMT

reggie (@kidnoble)Mon, 08 Feb 2021 03:43 GMT

https://twitter.com/RaxKingIsDead/status/1358610775464624128

my dude looks like he's his own child

Amy, Mothman Festival Queen (@cableknitjumper)Mon, 08 Feb 2021 03:19 GMT

I've dated over 100 tech guys aged 18-36 in last 25 years. When I look back at all of them, I wish I had spent 100% of that time adopting a child. I'd have actually raised a kid, not just a man disguised as one. Tech guys are a distraction until you achieve self-love.

Allison Reichel (@AllisonReichel)Sun, 07 Feb 2021 15:54 GMT

Imagine being the kind of petty person who blocks everyone who dares to disagree with your shitty horrible takes while pretending to be mega woke.

Shubheksha ✨ (@ScribblingOn)Sun, 07 Feb 2021 00:27 GMT

the fact that this man started out in the mcu as just a voice in iron man’s suit now he’s doing shit like this

jess (@artinventcr)Sat, 06 Feb 2021 15:59 GMT