Kind likes

Last weekend, I won Pan Am championships and didn’t even crack a smile. Today, I started crying and had to walk away because I couldn’t get a cake out of pan. I don’t have anything clever to say, just want y’all to know that anyone can struggle with anything.

Tim Banks is a melanated Bacchus (@elchefe)Sun, 23 May 2021 16:09 +0000

https://twitter.com/cal_gif/status/1396491461726703616

boy if I had a nickel for every time someone wrote down my name

you can call me al (@bbycoldbrew)Sun, 23 May 2021 15:43 +0000

when you have to work up the courage to make a phone call

☣️eff word☣️ (@DullVivid)Sat, 22 May 2021 06:16 +0000

Why are we the worst country

Sophie Koonin (@type__error)Sat, 22 May 2021 22:04 +0000

https://twitter.com/type__error/status/1396225540860821504

In Eurovision or just like... generally

Kate is cake. Always has been. (@SBinLondon)Sun, 23 May 2021 12:33 +0000

Thank you for the thousands of well wishes and congratulations yesterday for me and @Jaimi_Shrive We had an amazing time, an absolutely perfect day ❤️ We have a million pics to work through from an EPIC party too 🥳

Dr. Jessica Taylor (@DrJessTaylor)Sun, 23 May 2021 13:01 +0000

In general, staying calm during an incident is a superpower. It’s like the difference between how you code normally and how you code during an interview. It’s also a skill that you can learn over time. Even if you’re an anxious person, you can get better at it.

Lorin Hochstein (@norootcause)Sat, 22 May 2021 22:21 +0000

if salesforce has a chief availability officer do they also have a chief consistency officer and a chief partition tolerance officer or do they only have two

Senior Oops Engineer (@ReinH)Sat, 22 May 2021 21:43 +0000

> removing bathing suit in hot tub “Hey babe, nobody’s coming over right?” Wife: “I don’t know somebody might” “Well if they do, they’ll be calling me sir from now on” Wife: “sir baby dick” THE APPRENTICE HAS BECOME THE MASTER

SQLite Boi Summer (@ken_wheeler)Sat, 22 May 2021 20:41 +0000

https://twitter.com/annamv10/status/1395947649635815424

A friend took a photo of me at Folsom Street Fair a couple years ago, posted to IG, it somehow went viral, and now it’s a meme! (Comes up about monthly, in various languages, across the internet.) A fun “fun fact”!

Amruta Godbole (@dj_roots)Sat, 22 May 2021 04:01 +0000

I’m in this photo and I don’t like it. Jk. I mean that is actually me in the photo. But I like it every time.

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olivia rodrigo with her new fans

✨ Mikey Almeida ✨ (@mikey_almeida)Fri, 21 May 2021 20:43 +0000

Amruta Godbole (@dj_roots)Sat, 22 May 2021 01:39 +0000

https://twitter.com/__femb0t/status/1395470302985932801

women out there appropriating femboy culture, smh :/

⁅Gateway of last resort⁆ (@Wxcafe)Fri, 21 May 2021 03:28 +0000

fembot (@__femb0t)Thu, 20 May 2021 20:01 +0000

kim  (@kaydacode)Fri, 21 May 2021 15:43 +0000

#tbt to the greatest page I ever received in residency

Adam Ludvigson (@adamlud)Fri, 21 May 2021 02:19 +0000

This is your regular reminder that as a person of colour, it's NOT your job to do all the extra labour to educate white folks.

Shubheksha ✨ (@ScribblingOn)Sat, 22 May 2021 13:57 +0000

every weekend, I say to myself "I will finish my personal website and deploy it" every weekend, I lay on the couch doing nothing instead today, my domain auto-renewed

Kat Cosgrove (@Dixie3Flatline)Sat, 22 May 2021 13:59 +0000

Hey Ya by Outkast

Raven the Science Maven (@ravenscimaven)Sat, 22 May 2021 12:48 +0000

https://twitter.com/ravenscimaven/status/1396085609404436483

why do people keep playing this at weddings 😭

Kat Cosgrove (@Dixie3Flatline)Sat, 22 May 2021 12:51 +0000

My job in one picture

Ti (@chumboslice)Fri, 21 May 2021 14:43 +0000

Dead

Lyzi Diamond (@lyzidiamond)Fri, 21 May 2021 17:32 +0000

DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN PUT RUST IN YOUR BUTT

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Rust ensures memory safety via a bunch of evangelists who strive to make sure you never forget about Rust for even a minute.

Corey Quinn (@QuinnyPig)Fri, 21 May 2021 15:35 +0000

buttplug.io 🍑🔌 - Open Source Sex Tech (@buttplugio)Fri, 21 May 2021 18:06 +0000

It's our first time participating in a global Twitter #LovenseOrgy, so please wish us a warm welcome! We'll get 1,000s of sex toys buzzing to the beat of Mr. Roboto if you tweet or retweet our hashtag #futureofsexforlovense 🤖💦 futureofsex.net/remote-sex/lov…

FutureofSex (@FutureofSex)Sat, 22 May 2021 04:00 +0000

Interesting! Women prefer remote work at a higher rate than men, citing not having to get dressed up and having more flexibility as key reasons. This resonates with me a lot - NOT needing to put in 30+ minutes on hair/makeup daily adds up quickly. axios.com/the-gender-div…

Sommer Panage (@Sommer)Fri, 21 May 2021 21:58 +0000

when i was younger instead of saying "i'm hungry" i would say "i need to be neutered" because i thought it meant i needed nutrients. sorry

camila (@Camila_Cabello)Fri, 05 Jun 2015 13:43 +0000

DHH Built himself up on the social media reach he had, spouting opinions and posting about people who he thought were wrong. Then when he gets criticised for his shitty attitude and actions he runs away. Coward.

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"That idea of being done was the most compelling part of receiving a print newspaper. Most people are just not going to go back to print, though. That doesn't mean you have to give up on done. I've been trying a new experiment, and you might like it too." world.hey.com/dhh/not-just-w…

DHH (@dhh)Fri, 21 May 2021 11:38 +0000

Matt Brunt (@Brunty)Fri, 21 May 2021 14:04 +0000

Rust ensures memory safety via a bunch of evangelists who strive to make sure you never forget about Rust for even a minute.

Corey Quinn (@QuinnyPig)Fri, 21 May 2021 15:35 +0000

women leadership workshops that teach women "how to demonstrate confidence and competence" or "how to collaborate better" are misdirecting blame. What we really need is for society to learn not to undermine us and assume incompetence.

Naomi (@naomi_pen)Fri, 21 May 2021 16:02 +0000

absolutely cracking up at my instagram explore page

jill (@jillcross69)Thu, 20 May 2021 01:46 +0000

Fucking lol so Digital Ocean won't hire in Colorado now because they would have to share salary info.

SIGWITCH⛧ (@lindseybieda)Fri, 21 May 2021 13:25 +0000

https://twitter.com/JamieTanna/status/1395490462744580105

Well, that is once I finish migrating... (jvt.me/mf2/2021/05/gh…)

Jamie Tanna | www.jvt.me (@JamieTanna)Thu, 20 May 2021 21:42 +0000

“ur so quiet” i don’t make sense when i talk bro

Aqs (@urshazadih)Thu, 20 May 2021 16:15 +0000

🚨 Life News Alert!🚨 Super excited to announce I will be joining @ASOS as a Senior Android Developer next week! Very excited to get started, learn a whole bunch and meet a brand new (super talented) team! 🙌✨

Ed George (@Sp4ghettiCode)Fri, 21 May 2021 14:41 +0000

My son at the dinner table tonight: "Tradition is just peer pressure from dead people."

Kim Scott (@kimballscott)Fri, 21 May 2021 03:49 +0000

This might be the funniest thing I’ve ever seen

Taylor (@mista_cocks)Thu, 20 May 2021 11:29 +0000

Anybody ever achieve a status of being technical debt-free?

InfoSteph (@StephandSec)Thu, 20 May 2021 14:50 +0000

https://twitter.com/ThisIsMissEm/status/1395493755483041801

Seriously, how pretty is this new artwork I purchased? (Have watermarked this version)

Emelia 👸🏻 (@ThisIsMissEm)Thu, 20 May 2021 21:44 +0000

https://twitter.com/TatianaTMac/status/1395421065237581825

I've never said it out loud, but I've sometimes thought of it as "being a salmon" or "salmoning". Always trying to get upstream, avoiding bears along the way. :)

Sean Killeen (@sjkilleen)Thu, 20 May 2021 16:51 +0000

I'm in a meeting with 45+ people, including VPs and Directors, and someone literally just unmuted for a second, belched lengthily and loudly, and muted themselves again. what

kat on main (@zkat__)Thu, 20 May 2021 17:38 +0000

Not me thinking I just got 17k followers 😭

Miriam 🥷🏽 (@kaktyc444)Tue, 18 May 2021 16:41 +0000

I should have bought onlyfans.dev and just have it redirect to the Android Studio download link

Prince Wilson (@maxcell)Wed, 19 May 2021 21:44 +0000

https://twitter.com/QuinnyPig/status/1395118098735194117

Then it charges you $5 per GB that it ingests and "processes," which looks a lot like "basic arithmetic." This entire process should be replaced with a button labeled "smee" in the console. When you click it, you get a popup saying "smee again, goan fuck yourself!"

Corey Quinn (@QuinnyPig)Wed, 19 May 2021 20:45 +0000

I've seen it mentioned that twitter is full of JS devs and a smattering of other folks, but that Java is under-represented. I'd say that's true and I think I know why. Writing relatable Java content that fits in a tweet is hard 😂

Laurie (@laurieontech)Wed, 19 May 2021 18:09 +0000

This isn’t a cat. It’s actually a CTO holding onto to an outdated opinion about a technology they used once

Jared Palmer (@jaredpalmer)Tue, 18 May 2021 17:35 +0000

https://twitter.com/danpopnyc/status/1394817391822049283

Yeah?

Kat Cosgrove Official (@Dixie3Flatline)Wed, 19 May 2021 01:11 +0000