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Patton Oswalt absolutely nailed this prediction #BookofBobaFett (Spoiler Warning)

Lights, Camera, Pod (@LightsCameraPod)Thu, 30 Dec 2021 01:52 GMT

https://twitter.com/jesslynnrose/status/1478319925789872129

“Learning to forgive myself in 2022 🥺” Babes, you work in corporate surveillance and misinformation. You’re supposed to feel bad. That’s what feeling bad is for.

Jessica Rose (@jesslynnrose)Tue, 04 Jan 2022 11:01 GMT

I’m seeing a lot of self care tweets about forgiving yourself, which is nice. But for my tech friends*, if you’re doing harmful shit, you have to STOP DOING IT before forgiving yourselves. *this applies to other people but I feel most comfortable fussing at tech folks

Jessica Rose (@jesslynnrose)Tue, 04 Jan 2022 10:58 GMT

https://twitter.com/alex_navarro/status/1477704177711263749

This is the premise of Dunston Checks In (1996)

climate crisis actor 🌹 (@docklesshuman)Sun, 02 Jan 2022 18:17 GMT

One might say they have bad ApeSec

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https://twitter.com/edzitron/status/1477703853944434688

look i know all this shit sucks beyond comprehension but “did not take proper precautions when moving his ape” is just an objectively funny sentence.

Yeet Takeshi (@alex_navarro)Sun, 02 Jan 2022 18:11 GMT

Ed Zitron (@edzitron)Sun, 02 Jan 2022 18:13 GMT

https://twitter.com/edzitron/status/1477703853944434688

look i know all this shit sucks beyond comprehension but “did not take proper precautions when moving his ape” is just an objectively funny sentence.

Yeet Takeshi (@alex_navarro)Sun, 02 Jan 2022 18:11 GMT

I don’t have a brain today but people pay me to have a brain SOS

Jonathan Graziano (@jongraz)Mon, 03 Jan 2022 15:55 GMT

Everyone this morning (except Scotland) when they realise they have to go to work today:

Stephen Mullen (@StephenMullen)Tue, 04 Jan 2022 08:31 GMT

Back?!? Bitch we have been the backbone of the internet for the past 10 years

ft (@ft_variations)Mon, 03 Jan 2022 17:35 GMT

The coronavirus API documentation, specifically, is the gold standard by which all API docs should be assessed. It’s clear! It generates URLs you can paste into your code! It regards helping people get to the info as a point, rather than seeing the API as an exam you have to pass

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Some personal news (a 🧵): On 4 October 2021, I resigned from my role as the Deputy Head of Software Engineering for Web and Data at @UKHSA. This means that 1 January 2022 will mark my final day in the agency — but *not* on the dashboard, so this is not goodbye. ...[1/10]

Pouria Hadjibagheri (@Pouriaaa)Fri, 24 Dec 2021 10:48 GMT

Chris Cook (@xtophercook)Fri, 24 Dec 2021 10:55 GMT

https://twitter.com/holly/status/1478283698034417669

Pearls... heh

Holly Brockwell - Queen of Spayeds (@holly)Tue, 04 Jan 2022 08:38 GMT

https://twitter.com/holly/status/1478279497183072261

Oh put your pearls down, we are all the product of an orgasm and that's just a weird creepy fact we all have to live with

Holly Brockwell - Queen of Spayeds (@holly)Tue, 04 Jan 2022 08:34 GMT

Some women - including me - are allergic to some men's sperm. Apparently it's certain proteins that set it off, but you could equally say I have... ...a nut allergy 😎

Holly Brockwell - Queen of Spayeds (@holly)Tue, 04 Jan 2022 08:16 GMT

"Hey Eva, what is it like to be a woman in tech?"

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https://twitter.com/evacide/status/1478209482433830913

You are an intensely public figure, deliberately having thrust yourself into the media. You are a social media influencer with 167k followers here and then act all high and mighty when occasionally someone contacts you for business. #stophuffingyourownfarts

Fake PhD Investigator (@FakePhD_reveal)Tue, 04 Jan 2022 08:09 GMT

Eva (@evacide)Tue, 04 Jan 2022 08:55 GMT

From what I understand, you're supposed to use two spaces after a period when using a monospace font. 80% of the text I write is in monospace, so I'm in the habit of using two spaces. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Aaron Patterson (@tenderlove)Tue, 04 Jan 2022 01:17 GMT

I've discovered a new passion: Adding Magneto quotes to pictures of babies in x-ray restraints.

Frank (@FMummert)Mon, 03 Jan 2022 19:10 GMT

it’s coming for us all

Marianne 🖤 protect black lives (@bronzebygold)Sun, 02 Jan 2022 14:56 GMT

My first commercial app (when I was baby) had an individual git repo for each of my lambda crud resolvers because I deluded myself into thinking granular deploys would provide customer value in some way

Jacob Paris 🍁 (@jacobmparis)Tue, 04 Jan 2022 05:48 GMT

if someone tells you an app needs 25 times more repositories than developers, they're clearly in the pocket of Big DevOps

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My first commercial app (when I was baby) had an individual git repo for each of my lambda crud resolvers because I deluded myself into thinking granular deploys would provide customer value in some way

Jacob Paris 🍁 (@jacobmparis)Tue, 04 Jan 2022 05:48 GMT

Jacob Paris 🍁 (@jacobmparis)Tue, 04 Jan 2022 05:59 GMT

The first 13 minutes of The Suicide Squad up to the opening credits are so damn funny. Just brilliant.

Rich Burroughs (@richburroughs)Tue, 04 Jan 2022 06:27 GMT

https://twitter.com/richburroughs/status/1478251601458520064

The assault on the beach especially. When they’re shooting TDK’s arms and then it cuts to him writhing around on the ground in pain. I can’t even 😂

Rich Burroughs (@richburroughs)Tue, 04 Jan 2022 06:28 GMT

https://twitter.com/mattray/status/1478252498020225024

How will I manage without bursting into a Zoolander gas fight though?

Tim Smith (@tas50)Tue, 04 Jan 2022 06:34 GMT

https://twitter.com/slutpilled/status/1478256793721745413

oh they just asked me. I've been collecting data and running the numbers for a while

j̴̢͘҉i̸̢͞z̛̛̀҉͞z̡͞w̶̵̢͜͞i̡͘t̸͝͝c̸͝h̀͏ (@fingerbIaster)Tue, 04 Jan 2022 07:09 GMT

https://twitter.com/slutpilled/status/1478256452917772288

there's no way you could get a large enough sample size of people to agree to get their dicks hard in front of someone in a lab coat for science

violet valentine (@slutpilled)Tue, 04 Jan 2022 06:47 GMT

https://twitter.com/slutpilled/status/1478258471162290176

show me the methodology on these supposed measures of average penis length

violet valentine (@slutpilled)Tue, 04 Jan 2022 06:55 GMT

there's no such thing as average penis length

violet valentine (@slutpilled)Tue, 04 Jan 2022 06:46 GMT

https://twitter.com/slutpilled/status/1478256793721745413

those who would agree to it would mostly be people with bigger penises anyway so you would end up with a sampling bias

violet valentine (@slutpilled)Tue, 04 Jan 2022 06:54 GMT

Omicron at every New Years party tonight.

Burg (@burglol)Fri, 31 Dec 2021 12:36 GMT

Early 2022 Twitter timeline so far is just extreme whiplash between people getting covid and people getting new jobs

swyx (@swyx)Mon, 03 Jan 2022 17:45 GMT

Few people understand that Twitter is the general Slack channel for everyone in tech.

Anna Gát 🧭 Miami/NYC (Jan10-Feb7) (@TheAnnaGat)Sun, 02 Jan 2022 17:21 GMT

https://twitter.com/mozilla/status/1476951030638260225

Hi, I'm sure that whoever runs this account has no idea who I am, but I founded @mozilla and I'm here to say fuck you and fuck this. Everyone involved in the project should be witheringly ashamed of this decision to partner with planet-incinerating Ponzi grifters.

j͕̠̦̪͕̓͛̊̾̄ͅw̧̧̳̪̘͊̋͗̾͢͠z̢̘̞͈̺̞̩̓̽̐̋͗̆̋̚͟͜ (@jwz)Mon, 03 Jan 2022 15:15 GMT

I have news!! I'm joining @remote as their Head of Developer Experience and Education! ✨

Cassidy (@cassidoo)Mon, 03 Jan 2022 17:09 GMT

https://twitter.com/rawkode/status/1477984433764540422

Your timeline is just a @jenkinsci pipeline with some flaky and hence unstable tests 🤪🤗

Oleg Nenashev (@oleg_nenashev)Mon, 03 Jan 2022 15:56 GMT

A college boyfriend of mine said he thought it was fair to challenge women engineers to prove themselves as good as men. Surely, if the women were as good, then they could just prove it? He couldn't imagine what a life would be like for someone always tasked to prove themselves.

Adriana Porter Felt (@__apf__)Mon, 03 Jan 2022 15:56 GMT

It's just that level of cold in Nottingham today where us Brits will use the word 'nippy' and all universally understand what that means

Ed George 🍝 (@Sp4ghettiCode)Mon, 03 Jan 2022 16:00 GMT

The Call for Proposals (CFP) for codebar Festival is still open. If you've ever thought about speaking at an event this is the most welcoming audience. If you have an idea for a session and want to run it by someone, or have someone help you develop your idea. Drop me a DM!

Kimberley Cook (@KimberleyCook91)Mon, 03 Jan 2022 11:04 GMT

If Psaki won't even go into the same room with more than 14 triple-vaxxed, regularly tested and masked people, you shouldn't have to go to work and you definitely shouldn't send your kids to school.

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The White House press briefing room is being reduced to only fourteen seats due to concerns about omicron, effective tomorrow, per the @whca.

Scott Bixby (@scottbix)Mon, 03 Jan 2022 01:03 GMT

#ACAB (@OLAASM)Mon, 03 Jan 2022 01:39 GMT

i understand finding matrix 4’s lack of subtlety grating but i would never wanna use metaphors again either if the metaphorical allegory i wrote before got co-opted by far right patriarchal fascists whose whole thing is to eradicate my entire people

Auld Sang Lyne (@ElSangito)Sun, 02 Jan 2022 18:14 GMT

Ok, I think this is the year I finally learn how to drive. Only experience so far: Mario Kart. But I’ve been told that’s not the same.

Pauline P. Narvas 🐾💪🏼💜 (@paulienuh)Sun, 02 Jan 2022 11:21 GMT

API design is product design.

🎆🧁 Mark Dalgleish (@markdalgleish)Mon, 03 Jan 2022 07:54 GMT

https://twitter.com/EmmaBostian/status/1477945689976020994

Don't worry I didn't make her social media accounts because A) I am not on-board with baby influencers and B) She won't have social media until she's 27.

Emma Bostian 🐞 (@EmmaBostian)Mon, 03 Jan 2022 10:12 GMT

Tell me you're over-preparing for your baby without TELLING me you're over-preparing for your baby: I just made my unborn baby a Gmail account to make sure she has a professional email address 📩

Emma Bostian 🐞 (@EmmaBostian)Mon, 03 Jan 2022 10:11 GMT

I just bought my unborn baby a domain name that will likely sit unused for years... starting off strong.

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Let this be the year I don’t buy 12 domains and let them sit there in solitary confinement 💻

Emma Bostian 🐞 (@EmmaBostian)Mon, 03 Jan 2022 07:05 GMT

Emma Bostian 🐞 (@EmmaBostian)Mon, 03 Jan 2022 10:20 GMT

Did Betty White have balls of steel? No, she had labia of titanium. Like all fab feminists! (Thx to all pals who sent me this reminder of her general wonderfulness. ) RIP #BettyWhite

Kathy Lette (@KathyLette)Sun, 02 Jan 2022 21:28 GMT

Rapid Antigen Tests should be free.

Australian Greens (@Greens)Mon, 03 Jan 2022 02:33 GMT