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I just typed "duck yeah" and my phone autocorrected it to "fuck yeah" and I am feeling very powerful right now

Dreams Bigger Than Heartbreak is OUT NOW!!! 🌟🌟🌟 (@charliejane)Sat, 30 Apr 2022 20:27 +0000

This is how every product should "shut down" once the owners decide to move on to something different, and at the same time give the project the chance to get a new life. James decided to open source the project instead of just closing down.

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I'm open-sourcing Actual. I'm sad that I couldn't make it work as a sustainable company, but I've seen the magic of open-source before and I'm excited about what can happen here. Read more! actualbudget.com/open-source

James Long (@jlongster)Fri, 29 Apr 2022 15:30 +0000

flavio (@flaviocopes)Sat, 30 Apr 2022 09:13 +0000

“me and who🥰” you and a therapist

jamie 🛸 (@flvckojamie)Sat, 30 Apr 2022 00:46 +0000

https://twitter.com/elchefe/status/1520051894370058241

I would think it's obvious what he gets paid for: Being an asshole.

Marc Boorshtein (@mlbiam)Fri, 29 Apr 2022 14:57 +0000

BREAKING: Elon Musk is no longer a capitalist because he has just been publicly owned x

Laura Kuenssberg Translator (@BBCLauraKT)Sat, 30 Apr 2022 14:33 +0000

Jfc twitter

Katelyn Botden (@medus4_cdc)Sat, 30 Apr 2022 17:26 +0000

Cishet people who say partner/spouse instead of using gendered terms are doing a good thing and should be encouraged and not made fun of

Ava (@IikeClockwork)Thu, 28 Apr 2022 22:57 +0000

“The price of stopping a dictator always goes up. Meeting evil halfway is still a victory for evil." – Estonian PM Kaja Kalla

Paul Massaro (@apmassaro3)Fri, 29 Apr 2022 22:52 +0000

Did I just use nmap to find a port on a local server I was running something on because I forgot? Yes. Yes I did.

Matt Brunt (@Brunty)Sat, 30 Apr 2022 15:46 +0000

My husband at breakfast this morning in his best Hermione Granger voice: "It's mimOsa, not mimoSA!" 🪄 I love him ❤️ 🤣

Jack Linke 🌈 (@JackDLinke)Sat, 30 Apr 2022 15:46 +0000

Florida cops sent more than a dozen units to respond to stolen Pokémon cards and ended up shooting four people, killing one of them. You can’t tell me this is reformable.

Mac (@GoodPoliticGuy)Sat, 30 Apr 2022 00:43 +0000

https://twitter.com/aweary/status/1517493894543552513

We have an engineer leaving in a few months and they have a list of things that's bugged them for ages, so I'm pushing to let them do that because it's anet benefit for everyone and it's not worth them becoming too knowledgeable in new products.

Ross 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿💙 (@RHenderson91)Fri, 22 Apr 2022 18:19 +0000

https://twitter.com/caraesten/status/1520417575229747200

sure, all the hot celebs are trans, it's a big conspiracy, I'm glad you recognize how hot we are, at least

Cara (@caraesten)Sat, 30 Apr 2022 15:01 +0000

Excited to get this message from people we're visiting tomorrow 🍖

Chris Evans (@evnsio)Sat, 30 Apr 2022 15:08 +0000

The Conservative Party in 2022.

Michael Spicer (@MrMichaelSpicer)Sat, 30 Apr 2022 11:55 +0000

https://twitter.com/majorhayden/status/1520376884785201152

Netlify has one of the easiest gh pages integrations ever. It's what I use. My blog costs me ~$10/year to own the domain.

Steve Martinelli (@stevebot)Sat, 30 Apr 2022 12:31 +0000

This still applies, especially to any billionaires who certainly don’t need your amplification.

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A reminder that may not be obvious: amplification on social networks has monetary value. Twitter’s algorithm counts it as engagement even if you shared a tweet to criticize it or mock it, and uses that signal to amplify the tweet further. Only RT what you would pay to promote.

anildash (@anildash)Sun, 01 Mar 2020 22:23 GMT

anildash (@anildash)Sat, 30 Apr 2022 12:28 +0000

Blog formats ranked by reader friendliness: 1. Self-hosted blog 2. Github Pages ... 57. Pinning theses on a church door ... 275. Medium

Erik Bernhardsson (@bernhardsson)Fri, 29 Apr 2022 14:58 +0000

This is exactly the sort of thing that needs to happen to make the tech industry more open to women; got to disperse the "guys only" myth early! theguardian.com/society/2022/a…

James King (@ripixelcodes)Sat, 30 Apr 2022 10:39 +0000

https://twitter.com/rizbizkits/status/1519086973763440642

🏝 day 4 📍 Dosa & Chutney

rizwana akmal khan 🧣 (@rizbizkits)Fri, 29 Apr 2022 14:19 +0000

Truly, men have the worse of everything…⸮ But, there's something we blokes can be grateful for. No matter what grief the world throws at us, it'll always be the women's fault that there aren't enough …

https://twitter.com/lesmiz89/status/1520086867307204608

An ancient throat goat huh? 🤣

Keeferfer (@keeferfer)Fri, 29 Apr 2022 20:10 +0000

https://twitter.com/writtenbyirene/status/1520042848866947074

Actually her beauty was a myth. She was homely looking. It was her personality that was seductive.

Engineer Girl (@lesmiz89)Fri, 29 Apr 2022 17:05 +0000

https://twitter.com/IRafael_MRocha/status/1520107911430742018

Yeah some people like to support their fav content creators, that’s very normal actually

dove 🕊 (@lovedoveclarke)Fri, 29 Apr 2022 18:37 +0000

https://twitter.com/keeferfer/status/1520133385657720833

she put the dick in a sarcophagus for SURE

matt (@matty_dev)Fri, 29 Apr 2022 22:26 +0000

Cleopatra was born out of 7 generations of incest so how hot could she have been really

irene (@writtenbyirene)Fri, 29 Apr 2022 14:10 +0000

We need more ‘older people’ romcoms. I’m tired of teenagers falling in love! They’re dumb! I don’t care!

T✨ (@txadel_)Fri, 29 Apr 2022 14:50 +0000

i accidentally said “big” instead of “grande” at starbucks n they took me behind the store n shot me in my leg

Noah ✵ (@noahdonotcare)Fri, 29 Apr 2022 18:03 +0000

I didn't get the Wordle today (look it's been a long week) but then it TOLD ME THE ANSWER where it usually says "Splendid" or "Phew" or whatever so I THOUGHT IT WAS CALLING ME AND MY GAMEPLAY THAT WORD!?!

Elisa Gabbert (@egabbert)Fri, 29 Apr 2022 13:14 +0000

These are the voyages of the starship Enterprise... Here's your first look at the opening titles from #StarTrek #StrangeNewWorlds!

Star Trek on Paramount+ (@StarTrekOnPPlus)Fri, 29 Apr 2022 14:30 +0000

https://twitter.com/bradshankar/status/1520052650879954945

Read the lyrics lmao

Marc (@MarAbh999)Fri, 29 Apr 2022 18:33 +0000

https://twitter.com/Variety/status/1520050793524736001

Brad Shankar (@bradshankar)Fri, 29 Apr 2022 14:49 +0000

What is even the point then

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Aqua’s ‘Barbie Girl’ Song Won’t Appear in the Margot Robbie ‘Barbie’ Movie variety.com/2022/film/news…

Variety (@Variety)Fri, 29 Apr 2022 14:42 +0000

Valondar (@VK_HM)Fri, 29 Apr 2022 14:42 +0000

And there it is.... Ambushed by porn. 🙄

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The Tory MP said he 'opened something on his phone in error' but his wife called the allegation 'breath taking and embarrassing' bit.ly/3KstQYf

LBC (@LBC)Sat, 30 Apr 2022 06:00 +0000

Dawn Butler MP✊🏾💙 (@DawnButlerBrent)Sat, 30 Apr 2022 07:48 +0000

https://twitter.com/LaurentSierra1/status/1520283147207942146

Agree if in private. Was he in a private location ?. No and he must have looked at it sufficiently long enough to upset nearby women MPs

Nick (@Nick23904465)Sat, 30 Apr 2022 06:09 +0000

Stop recommending therapy for burnout without acknowledging and addressing the institutional problems that cause burnout. You’re unfairly placing the onus on individuals for surviving in a hostile environment. Systemic change is the cure for burnout.

Lawren is Openly Black (@pedsmd2b)Fri, 29 Apr 2022 20:52 +0000

there is no "trans debate" you're just transphobic people are not debatable

🦇 semi-goth jezebel (@the_meghaning)Thu, 28 Apr 2022 22:32 +0000

“The extreme left is taking over” WHERE. In Texas, Republicans passed a law allowing rapists to sue their victims for getting an abortion. Can anyone name a “far left” policy that extreme implemented anywhere? We can’t even get our party to import cheaper RXs from Canada. foh

Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (@AOC)Fri, 29 Apr 2022 18:29 +0000

my best guess as to why so many people seem to think the far left is ascendant is that they were made to attend a single corporate diversity training and lost their fucking minds

Law Boy, Esq. (@The_Law_Boy)Fri, 29 Apr 2022 15:08 +0000

I built a personal site! Though it's always "in-progress" where I keep reiterating, adding new stuff, changing the styles, etc. But I'm ready to show it to the world :D Made using @nextjs, hosted on @vercel, here's a thread of features my site has:

Aayush Sahu (@aayushmau5)Fri, 29 Apr 2022 23:43 +0000

Eh, screw it. It's friday. Like this tweet and I'll subtweet you.

Laurie (@laurieontech)Fri, 29 Apr 2022 19:34 +0000

I beat cancer. If they suddenly find a cure for cancer now, I’m gonna be so mad! This tweet is about student loans.

Aaron Fullerton (@AaronFullerton)Thu, 28 Apr 2022 17:07 +0000

The rare Simpsons joke where the punchline involves Homer’s nominal expertise as a safety inspector twitter.com/simpsons_dg/st…

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Wait a minute. There's something bothering me about this place... #lesbianvisability

Simpsons Daily Glavins (@simpsons_DG)Thu, 28 Apr 2022 05:33 +0000

Valondar (@VK_HM)Fri, 29 Apr 2022 00:06 +0000

Wait a minute. There's something bothering me about this place... #lesbianvisability

Simpsons Daily Glavins (@simpsons_DG)Thu, 28 Apr 2022 05:33 +0000

She would've loved that joke!

Nate Bargatze (@natebargatze)Thu, 28 Apr 2022 22:11 +0000

i love elon’s idea to charge people to embed tweets - not because the idea is good, but that it displays how he’s no more tech savvy and inventive than any other metrosexual uncle who finds out you “know computers” and has an idea for an app

jenn (@jennschiffer)Fri, 29 Apr 2022 17:00 +0000