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A Clockwork Orange for the kids.

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Every Brit in the UK (children included) should be obligated to watch the Queens funeral as it will forever be a huge part of British history and further education! As sad as Queen Elizabeth II passing is, it has really united the people which I thought was an impossible task 👏🏼 twitter.com/nigel_farage/s…

Ant Middleton (@antmiddleton)Wed, 14 Sep 2022 15:49 +0000

Aidan Comerford (@AidanCTweets)Thu, 15 Sep 2022 09:20 +0000

https://twitter.com/antmiddleton/status/1570077270454272001

Obligated? Why? Think you’ll have a hard job forcing the working class and proper people to agree to that

Mark (Junior) Brown (@markbrown1986)Wed, 14 Sep 2022 15:57 +0000

https://twitter.com/antmiddleton/status/1570077270454272001

I don't have the words to express how utterly and laughably ridiculous this is

Phil Bloomfield (@PhilBloomfield3)Wed, 14 Sep 2022 20:36 +0000

https://twitter.com/1TAPK1/status/1570098145559973889

Gord I’m not against people commemorating the Queen’s death but when you talk about Brits you know the Queen’s family going back a few generations were German and only changed their name to Windsor in 1917 and Prince Phillip was Greek? How does that fit in?

James Brown (@jamesjamesbrown)Wed, 14 Sep 2022 19:41 +0000

The cat who was completely obsessed with my bump when I was pregnant is quite uninterested in the baby now that she's out. It's a weird way to find out that my cat is a Republican.

Dr. Dana Ménard (@Shufflersunite)Wed, 14 Sep 2022 19:55 +0000

Woody and the toys whenever Andy walks in

James Felton (@JimMFelton)Thu, 15 Sep 2022 07:21 +0000

Oh no.

Jason Selvig (@jasonselvig)Tue, 13 Sep 2022 21:28 +0000

https://twitter.com/CarolSaysThings/status/1570057626020614144

i knew it!

Carol ☔️ (@CarolSaysThings)Wed, 14 Sep 2022 14:31 +0000

https://twitter.com/CarolSaysThings/status/1570057678290038786

🤣🤣

Carol ☔️ (@CarolSaysThings)Wed, 14 Sep 2022 14:31 +0000

me, in 2010: wdym katy perry? me, in 2022: i feel like a plastic bag all the time, actually

Carol ☔️ (@CarolSaysThings)Wed, 14 Sep 2022 14:25 +0000

I once received a plaque that said, "If you're going through hell, why stop there?"

Steve Harvey (@IAmSteveHarvey)Wed, 14 Sep 2022 13:47 +0000

I’m the quiet client. I like to receive my services in silence, I don’t wanna do too much talking😂

HER🦋 (@jawnnthadonn)Tue, 13 Sep 2022 19:08 +0000

https://twitter.com/CaylpsoDee/status/1569861375375118338

They do cuz the majority of them honestly can't wait to be done with yall!! Being done in 10 mins is the best thing that can be done for them cuz sir please go about your business!!

This Fly Black Girl🌻 (@BrownHunee)Wed, 14 Sep 2022 02:38 +0000

My wife has cat-like reflexes— she hides under furniture when I’m around.

Conan O'Brien (@ConanOBrien)Wed, 14 Sep 2022 16:25 +0000

The centenary special is called The Power of the Doctor for those who can’t afford a ten quid magazine because of the old cost of living crisis. I don’t think revealing five words from its pages will kill anyone.

SEE PINNED TWEET (@DimensionsInJen)Wed, 14 Sep 2022 09:16 +0000

It's called 'The Power of the Doctor' because the Doctor will die struggling to pay their gas and electric bills.

Mark (@Scuttlecliff)Wed, 14 Sep 2022 11:53 +0000

all these baby pumpkins drained of their spice and discarded behind a Starbucks

503jason (@503jason)Tue, 13 Sep 2022 01:33 +0000

RapiDoc is Web Component for viewing Swagger & OpenAPI Spec. Supports themes, styling and various rendering styles

We've been running govulncheck in CI about a week now. So far the only downside we've noticed is that it breaks every time a new version of Go comes out (including patch versions). Fix is to make sure to use `check-latest` on `actions/setup-go` steps. pkg.go.dev/golang.org/x/v…

Brandur (@brandur)Tue, 13 Sep 2022 19:25 +0000

Food banks will close next Monday. Investment banks will remain open.

David__Osland (@David__Osland)Tue, 13 Sep 2022 11:56 +0000

https://twitter.com/CenterParcsUK/status/1569666674713923584

So my belongings can stay but I cannot stay in my lodge. As yet @CenterParcsUK have not responded to any of mine or my other half’s tweets. Newspaper has been in touch though!

Clare (@misspiggy42)Tue, 13 Sep 2022 12:41 +0000

For the first time in over 45 years you can now walk from Nottingham Station to the Market Square without going inside a shopping centre or ruins.

Kev S (@kevjs1982)Sat, 10 Sep 2022 12:15 +0000

https://twitter.com/LittleLostLad/status/1569328539949846530

While you’re at it, how about spending 20 quid on a bag of groceries and giving it to a food bank, or the cash to a charity, rather than putting yet more bouquets of 💐 outside the numerous palaces? THAT would be some mark of respect and I’m sure she would approve!

John🇯🇵 (@Brady99John)Mon, 12 Sep 2022 21:02 +0000

https://twitter.com/LittleLostLad/status/1569328539949846530

This is peak 2022 Britain tbh. Prob stepped over some homeless ppl to deliver the sandwich to a fence that surrounds a palace no one actually lives in

Jo (@joannski84)Mon, 12 Sep 2022 19:56 +0000

Hello! Could you maybe deliver those marmalade sandwiches to people who need them rather than leaving them outside a palace? Thanks.

Paddington (@LittleLostLad)Mon, 12 Sep 2022 14:14 +0000

https://twitter.com/martinscpfc/status/1569570183848808449

So all homeless people are drug addicts? Why not give the food to a food bank then, if your prejudice doesn't extend to that?

Jon Dews - MA Keele (@JonDews100)Tue, 13 Sep 2022 07:46 +0000

https://twitter.com/martinscpfc/status/1569570183848808449

I think that says more about your sandwiches than them, Martin.

Paddington (@LittleLostLad)Tue, 13 Sep 2022 09:34 +0000

https://twitter.com/martinscpfc/status/1569570183848808449

Did you ask if they wanted a sandwich? Had any food intolerances? Dietary preferences? Some have a habit of wanting money to feed their dog.

SJA505 (@SJA505)Tue, 13 Sep 2022 07:34 +0000

sometimes I be unliking tweets after I think about that tweet for a second😂😂 like actually NO, this isn’t a good take 😭😭

Steve (@thahumorguy)Mon, 12 Sep 2022 14:06 +0000

14 comments

My boyfriend thought the wee moon on his lock screen was because we were in Turkey 🇹🇷 He’s spent the week in Do Not Disturb 💀

Alex 🏳️‍🌈🦒 (@AlexWJSimpson)Sun, 11 Sep 2022 19:16 +0000

biking through the czech countryside and my heart stopped

karl hess (@karlhess)Mon, 12 Sep 2022 18:34 +0000

reservations are so embarrassing like hi i’m here for my spaghetti appointment

slate (@PleaseBeGneiss)Mon, 12 Sep 2022 00:50 +0000

IF YOU ARE MAD THAT ‘THE LITTLE MERMAID’ IS BLACK YOU ARE A RACIST THERE’S NO WIGGLE ROOM HERE

Doug Benson (@DougBenson)Mon, 12 Sep 2022 17:16 +0000

https://twitter.com/JaguarGuitarMan/status/1569334373929086976

It's weird. You seem to dislike brown sex offenders but leap to the defence of rich white sex offenders. I'm just trying to work out the difference there. 🤔

Coventry Saint (@coventry_saint)Mon, 12 Sep 2022 20:27 +0000

If Person A is a nonce, and person B shouts at Person A "you're a nonce", person B is not the bad guy in this exchange.

Matt Thomas (@Trickyjabs)Mon, 12 Sep 2022 15:20 +0000

police when Police when the prince someone calls Andrew is a prince Andrew nonce A nonce

Dobby Club (@DobbyClub06)Mon, 12 Sep 2022 21:00 +0000

https://twitter.com/BaronKesteven/status/1569355908815241216

Why do you automatically jump to that equivalence?

Hamish (@hotshothamish29)Mon, 12 Sep 2022 17:13 +0000

https://twitter.com/chrismarshll/status/1569323294716829700

Why are the police taking away the victim of assault and not the people who assaulted him?

Ciarán Ferrie (@ccferrie)Mon, 12 Sep 2022 14:20 +0000

Prince Andrew heckled as the Queen's coffin passes

Christopher Marshall (@chrismarshll)Mon, 12 Sep 2022 13:53 +0000

The man who heckled Prince Andrew for being a nonce is going to face a stiffer punishment than Prince Andrew did for being a nonce

Council Estate Socialism (@RickyDHale)Mon, 12 Sep 2022 18:46 +0000

Let 9/11 be a warning to the world, if you attack America, we will go to war with 3 unrelated countries and then sell you our nuclear top secrets

Zack Bornstein (@ZackBornstein)Mon, 12 Sep 2022 18:32 +0000

“At her worst, she couldn’t unload a dishwasher, because identifying an object, remembering where it should go, and putting it there was too complicated.” you. don’t. want. this.

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🚨I wrote about “brain fog”—one of the most common & disabling symptoms of long COVID (and many other pre-pandemic conditions), and one of the most misunderstood. Here’s what brain fog actually is, and what it’s like to live with it. 1/ theatlantic.com/health/archive…

Ed Yong (@edyong209)Mon, 12 Sep 2022 12:32 +0000

chuck (@whatexactlyisup)Mon, 12 Sep 2022 13:51 +0000

interviewer: can you explain this gap in your resume? charles III: i was waiting for my mom to die

slate (@PleaseBeGneiss)Sat, 10 Sep 2022 14:43 +0000

Many of us use one-time passwords (OTP) regularly to log into different services. Most probably rely on Google Authenticator and similar tools. But what about building one by ourselves?