My son keeps turning my Prodigy music down, saying it's 'awful'. It's so unfair, he doesn't understand me or my music.

Ian Miell (@ianmiell)Sun, 01 Mar 2020 09:40 GMT

But can ur dog be this cute while playing fetch?

𝒫 (@paplovescats)Fri, 28 Feb 2020 20:22 GMT

https://twitter.com/OoCPokemon/status/1233938115502444546

I finally found it

Lolyea 999 (@lolyea777)Sun, 01 Mar 2020 02:31 GMT

Devs: please delete your code. Don't leave it commented out, or just in the repo as functions and files and modules that don't get called. Delete it while you know what it was for, so that the next person doesn't have to figure it out. Source control never forgets it.

Hugh Rawlinson (he/him) (@hughrawlinson)Sun, 01 Mar 2020 06:08 GMT

americans will freak out about coronavirus but not vaccinate their children, won't demand paid sick days, and oppose accessible healthcare. ok

Katerina Borodina (@ctrlshifti)Sat, 29 Feb 2020 23:24 GMT

There has to be a more humane way to make towels

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ODDLY SATISFYING: Team of vets pull AN ENTIRE BEACH TOWEL out of a python in Australia – with their bare hands.

CBS News (@CBSNews)Thu, 27 Feb 2020 22:00 GMT

jon rosenberg: comics boy🐍🥦 (@jonrosenberg)Fri, 28 Feb 2020 02:25 GMT

https://twitter.com/sfctoby/status/1233436945319170051

campinho Ʊ (@campinho_)Fri, 28 Feb 2020 18:33 GMT

Mind your own fucking business

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why is there a literal cube of snow downtown

guero (@fargoguero)Wed, 26 Feb 2020 19:17 GMT

literal cube of snow in downtown (@sfctoby)Fri, 28 Feb 2020 17:00 GMT

Work from home really means pet the cat while trying to type things 🙇‍♀️

Emma Bostian 🐞 (@EmmaBostian)Sat, 29 Feb 2020 13:19 GMT

In honor of today's Leap Day, @office365 will be taking 24 hours of downtime to avoid having to change their name.

Corey Quinn (@QuinnyPig)Sat, 29 Feb 2020 16:18 GMT

This just in: My business cards put all others to shame (Thanks for laying them out @wordwill!)

Trin @ PAX East (@TrinAndTonic)Fri, 28 Feb 2020 20:53 GMT

why write tests when you can just write perfect code instead and it takes less effort

laura bananas (@freezydorito)Sat, 29 Feb 2020 15:22 GMT

Hi, I’m a senior engineer. You might know me from my greatest hits “but *why* is it null?” “There is greater honor in deleting code than in writing more” And the chart-topping “let’s just walk over to them and ask”

Jules Glegg 🏳️‍⚧️ (@heyjulesfern)Thu, 27 Feb 2020 16:35 GMT

Static site generator is all but done. Gonna take another day for an early version I can use for my own site. That took..a week's worth of the scraps of time I have for code? Proves I can produce from scratch when I have a clear goal. Why I can't I make the other ideas clearer?

Steven Pears (@StevenPears)Sat, 29 Feb 2020 14:28 GMT

At @gitlab we quickly discovered that the week after a summit, everyone would get sick. Fist bumps to replace handshakes and telling people to wash their hands were the first things we implemented. It’s hard to change automatic behavior. Many fist-handshakes were given 🤜 🤝

Job (@Jobvo)Sat, 29 Feb 2020 09:21 GMT

I definitely live in the “avoid disaster” half, and sprinkle generously with “this could be simpler/more readable” 😅

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Boiled this out of some observations of code reviews across multiple orgs and teams. Lower right is my home quadrant but I can flex into enabler/mathematician depending on my stress level

Jules Glegg 🏳️‍⚧️ (@heyjulesfern)Thu, 27 Feb 2020 23:42 GMT

Carol 🥱 (@CarolSaysThings)Sat, 29 Feb 2020 09:32 GMT

How is my blog still getting hits from... Google+?!?

Terence Eden (@edent)Sat, 29 Feb 2020 09:34 GMT

Most tech companies struggle with gender diversity, especially at senior leadership levels. Sadly, so do we. 😵 (Ftr I would LOVE to hire more dudes, but it's just...so...hard to find qualified candidates)

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The product leadership team of @honeycombio — fucking solid

Megan Gleason (@fishmegs)Wed, 26 Feb 2020 00:55 GMT

Charity Majors (@mipsytipsy)Sat, 29 Feb 2020 07:52 GMT

February 29th. Only happens once every 4 years. I think it’s a good day to test yearly subscriptions on services and see if they only renew every 4yr as well. 😈

Mattias Geniar (@mattiasgeniar)Sat, 29 Feb 2020 07:48 GMT

https://twitter.com/krisnova/status/1233572757268357120

I’m not trans and don’t have an opinion. I just wanted to say I’m grateful you post things like this publicly, so that allies like me can learn. Even if Twitter sometimes is full of garbage people.

Todd Radel (@tradel)Sat, 29 Feb 2020 02:02 GMT

I’ve been having a minor panic attack over how little I know compared to my peers in my role at Amazon.... yesterday I dove pretty deep into one of our most complicated and vital distributed systems and realized most of this stuff is just fancy words for really simple concepts.

Jonathan M Henson (@JonathanMHenson)Fri, 28 Feb 2020 17:37 GMT

My phone keeps correcting mansplaining to nansplaining and now I need some nansplaining in my life. "Oh, you see dear, he broke up with you because you had sex with him. Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?"

Holly Brockwell (@holly)Fri, 28 Feb 2020 18:42 GMT

https://twitter.com/Humphreytalks/status/1233184797507256320

Thanks! What’s crazy is that if you made $10,000 an hour and work 40 hours per week, it would take 6000 years to make that much money.

he (@jerebloom)Fri, 28 Feb 2020 06:03 GMT

I have just been informed that locally “mocking cloud services” doesn’t mean what I thought it did and I owe @awscloud a stupendous apology.

Corey Quinn (@QuinnyPig)Thu, 27 Feb 2020 23:22 GMT

when you're 20+

‏ً (@90sJapan)Thu, 27 Feb 2020 21:32 GMT

https://twitter.com/JamieTanna/status/1232430087229800448

This is a strong look, it says "Yes I'm the leader of a death cult in the desert but I also go to Nandos"

Andrew Seward (@MrAndrew)Thu, 27 Feb 2020 19:57 GMT

https://twitter.com/JamieTanna/status/1232430087229800448

I don't think I'll ever get over the fact that you just had a massive (and let's face it, gross) hole in your stomach for AGES 🤯 So glad you kicked appendicitis' ass 🙌😊 xx

Emma Seward (@MrsEmma)Thu, 27 Feb 2020 20:01 GMT

Sometimes when I can’t figure out how to deploy an @awscloud service, I restrict an IAM user to just that service and check the keys in publicly just to see how the attacker configures it.

Corey Quinn (@QuinnyPig)Thu, 27 Feb 2020 17:40 GMT

At some point I switched out Facebook for Twitter because I much prefer the terrible politics of strangers to the terrible politics of people I know

Jacquelyn Ardam (@jaxwendy)Thu, 27 Feb 2020 02:38 GMT