The one on the right is one of my favorite “white men in love with Rihanna” snapshots. His cool daddy-o full body stretch gets me every time.

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when Ethan Hawke made his son switch seats just so he could talk to Rihanna.

fentxyy 🅴 (@fentxyy)Sat, 02 May 2020 17:56 +0000

Nichole 🍞🍯 (@tnwhiskeywoman)Sun, 03 May 2020 17:50 +0000

https://twitter.com/edent/status/1238360282247897090

A new variant of the hashtag has evolved! #COVID__19 That's with *two* underscores. "_ _ 1 9" Folksonomy (ˌfōkˈsänəmē) - noun, Computers: an annoying classification system derived from user-generated electronic tags that annotate and content. Designed to hinder analysis.

Terence Eden (@edent)Mon, 04 May 2020 05:58 +0000

I've grown up making custom, paper birthday cards for as long as I can remember. Figured in these pandemic times, I could give a shot at making one for you, too! 💎 Happiest Birthday, @CarolSaysThings 💛

riz (@rizbizkits)Sun, 03 May 2020 21:06 +0000

We are living through an unprecedented use of the term “unprecedented”

Jay Van Bavel (@jayvanbavel)Sat, 02 May 2020 16:59 +0000

out of context brooklyn nine nine🏳️‍🌈 (@nocontxt99)Sun, 03 May 2020 20:11 +0000

#InternationalBereavedMothersDay ⬅️ I didn't know this was a thing. Two hard anniversaries are looming and giving me the side eye. I know a lot of my friends have also struggled with pregnancy loss and I'm sending you *all* my love. This book is currently helping me a lot 💛

Emma Seward (@MrsEmma)Sun, 03 May 2020 20:42 +0000

https://twitter.com/JamieTanna/status/1257042324720361472

Thank you! 💛 We definitely will 🙌 Today I was reminded of this tweet you shared 😂 https://t.co/xFH8s0UAHn

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birthdays in the middle six months of 2020

pay essential workers like they’re essential (@bitandbang)Sat, 18 Apr 2020 23:57 +0000

Carol 😅 (@CarolSaysThings)Sun, 03 May 2020 20:23 +0000

I have so many ideas, I think this calls for some changes to my personal site 👩‍💻💡

Elle Townsend✨ (@_elletownsend)Sun, 03 May 2020 13:24 +0000

I know a blog post has reach when I get emails explaining it to me

bletchley punk is masked up (@alicegoldfuss)Sat, 02 May 2020 18:42 +0000

I hate to be rude, but the reason you are healthy enough to protest is because other people stayed the fuck home.

Bess Kalb (@bessbell)Sat, 02 May 2020 22:39 +0000

£850, i've been screwed

Dr James Kent (@DrJamesKent3)Sat, 02 May 2020 16:00 +0000

My husband just ate 6 poppadums, 4 onion bahji, 2 meat samosas, a mixed meat vindaloo with pilau rice & wiped his plate clean with naan bread, before turning to me & saying 'I think I've overdone it, next time don't order me any salad with the bahjis please.'

𝐏𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐥𝐲 (@pearlylondon)Sat, 02 May 2020 19:09 +0000

I want to be very clear, I want to say this in the strongest terms: we are terrified of having to go back to a world where strangers don’t cross the street to avoid you and people attempt to make small talk. they will have to drag us there kicking and screaming

macoroni n cheese (@freezydorito)Sat, 02 May 2020 21:46 +0000

Why I code against a mock API: 1 I control the speed 2 It's never down 3 No internet required 4 No cross-team dependency 5 I can force it to throw errors to simulate server errors 6 I can write fast, reliable app tests 7 When I find a bug, I can enhance mock data and test it

Cory House (@housecor)Fri, 01 May 2020 15:21 +0000

Very American to decide we are bored with COVID and therefore it is over

Jeff Kasanoff (@JeffKasanoff)Sun, 03 May 2020 01:53 +0000

Hands down this is still and always will be one of my fave stickers! I love it so much I don't think I'll ever stick it on my laptop. Thanks again @thrivensunshine! 🥰

Sarah Paz (@heysarahpaz)Sat, 02 May 2020 23:48 +0000

https://twitter.com/miss_jwo/status/1256616687023030279

Today we came up with the plan for the next 6 weeks - both for ourselves and our food/ medical needs. What I’ve realised is that we’ve been treating Lockdown like a client project. 😂 We have weekly sprint planning & retros. And it’s keeping me sane. 🥰

Jenny Wong 🐝 (@miss_jwo)Sat, 02 May 2020 16:08 +0000

oh wow airlines are panicking to sell off their excess food inventory to discount grocers lucky me just what i always wanted shitty overpriced airplane snacks in the comfort of my home

isis agora lovecruft (they/them) (@isislovecruft)Sat, 02 May 2020 18:45 +0000

The best part? This is running on ‘old’, stable, reliable infrastructure. You don’t *need* Kubernetes to scale, it’s perfectly possible to do that with oldskool infra. Linux servers, MySQL, Redis & PHP: 👌

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✅ Just noticed that, since launch, @OhDearApp has performed more than 1 billion checks. It also has sent a over 500 000 notifications ohdear.app Some cool additions, including performance monitoring, are coming soon to the service! 👍

Freek Van der Herten (@freekmurze)Sat, 02 May 2020 16:00 +0000

Mattias Geniar (@mattiasgeniar)Sat, 02 May 2020 17:23 +0000

Cant stop watching this

Giles Paley-Phillips (@eliistender10)Sat, 02 May 2020 07:30 +0000

“I have a feeding tube so I don’t die” - very serious, makes people uncomfortable even though it’s the truth “I got my small intestine pierced” - metal

Sarah Esterman (@SarahEsterman)Fri, 01 May 2020 22:51 +0000

First, welcome to your new life! Ask questions! Find a work buddy with whom you feel comfortable asking any tech question. Never let anyone make you feel bad asking a question - there are no dumb questions. Ask a lot. Draw diagrams. Read code. Reassert your assumptions. Breathe.

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I start my new job as a software developer tomorrow. I am both nervous and excited. Any tips/advice/things you wish you had known when starting out? I'd love to hear it! #CodeNewbie #WomenWhoCode

✨𝚓𝚎𝚜𝚜𝚒𝚌𝚊𝚓𝚊𝚍𝚎𝚌𝚘𝚍𝚎𝚜 (@javascript_jess)Fri, 01 May 2020 00:40 +0000

Scott Hanselman (@shanselman)Sat, 02 May 2020 08:24 +0000

“how’s your year going?” me:

sloane 🍑 (@skipper)Fri, 01 May 2020 19:14 +0000

https://twitter.com/existentialcoms/status/1256287173579431936

Al Sweigart (@AlSweigart)Fri, 01 May 2020 19:01 +0000

Apparently, I can't set my password to "Mr. Owl Ate My Metal Worm"

Terence Eden (@edent)Sat, 02 May 2020 13:47 +0000

No matter how much of a failure you think you are, you will almost certainly never lose $14,000,000,000 by tweeting irishtimes.com/business/trans…

VƎX is Super Gay (@vexwerewolf)Fri, 01 May 2020 21:27 +0000

Rest In Peace to one of the funniest actors I’ve ever had the joy of working with. Sam Lloyd made me crack up and break character every single time we did a scene together. He could not have been a kinder man. I will forever cherish the time I had with you, Sammy.

Zach Braff (@zachbraff)Fri, 01 May 2020 22:44 +0000

That “Hold Up! Wait a minute!” Gets me everytime 😭

RHOle Model (@Kapri_Sunnnnn)Fri, 01 May 2020 16:29 +0000

Has this one been done already? Cuz I’m feeling it. Always.

🌈 𝐂𝐨𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐫 💫 (@WTFcooner)Fri, 01 May 2020 23:22 +0000

Zoom should charge for the 40 minute cutoff version and make the endless meeting one free.

Mira Crisp (@misscrisp)Thu, 30 Apr 2020 15:30 +0000

Clearleft working from home recommendations.

Andy Budd (@andybudd)Fri, 01 May 2020 11:03 +0000

Happy #Caturday

Larry the Cat (@Number10cat)Sat, 02 May 2020 09:07 +0000

Planet Pokemon (@Planet_Pkmn)Fri, 01 May 2020 14:40 +0000

https://twitter.com/THe_ALex96/status/1256288821987217411

The old “we might have to overthrow a $640,000,000,000 a year industrial military complex with our rifles and ford F150’s” argument. So much for American might, and a strong Nat’l Guard.

chaz medina (@chazmedina1)Fri, 01 May 2020 19:47 +0000

It’s crazy that other countries solve their problems by coming up with solutions to their problems.

Kashana (@kashanacauley)Fri, 01 May 2020 18:04 +0000

left, America anti-lockdown protestor right, Auschwitz camp gate

manu saadia 🖖 (@trekonomics)Fri, 01 May 2020 23:22 +0000

https://twitter.com/BoyInTheTown/status/1256495517145718784

WHAT THE FUCK DID I JUST READ YO

Dr. Jessica Taylor (@DrJessTaylor)Sat, 02 May 2020 09:22 +0000

https://twitter.com/ms_mims/status/1256354609821396992

NO SCOOTERS™️ (@no_scooters)Fri, 01 May 2020 22:48 +0000