Out of Context Pokemon (@OoCPokemon)Fri, 31 Jul 2020 22:26 +0000

https://twitter.com/denvercoder/status/1289321163764580352

Imagine getting fired and possibly arrested for stealing the package and it ends up being some fucking JavaScript book 😂 ☠️

Adam Rackis (@AdamRackis)Fri, 31 Jul 2020 22:06 +0000

Impartiality from the BBC

Marcus Barnett (@marcusbarnett_)Fri, 31 Jul 2020 12:58 +0000

once again humiliated by feeling better after drinking water

Amanda Rosenberg (@AmandaRosenberg)Fri, 31 Jul 2020 17:23 +0000

0-day zoom hacks dropped in YT chat

LiveOverflow 🔴 (@LiveOverflow)Fri, 31 Jul 2020 16:55 +0000

RT @JustGetFlux In 2009 we first approached Apple to get f.lux on iPhones. Years of promises of API access. The last conversation we had with them was "that's too weird for most of our users. Like the Klingon keyboard." Then, they announced their clone onstage, Macworld 2016.

Carol 🌻 (@CarolSaysThings)Fri, 31 Jul 2020 15:27 +0000

Instead of having business meetings while golfing or climbing, execs are now getting together in Grand Theft Auto and Minecraft. For real. nytimes.com/2020/07/31/bus…

Kashmir Hill (@kashhill)Fri, 31 Jul 2020 15:10 +0000

So strange how they opened the pubs and now we have a higher infection rate.

David R White (@drdrwhite)Fri, 31 Jul 2020 10:32 +0000

do you consider 1024 to be a "nice, round number" or are you normal

Fiora (@FioraAeterna)Fri, 31 Jul 2020 09:01 +0000

https://twitter.com/JamieTanna/status/1289283525187780608

Too hot for fur

David Evans (@_davevans_)Fri, 31 Jul 2020 19:39 +0000

https://twitter.com/CarolSaysThings/status/1289240246404526082

We just got soaked and it was lovely 💛✨

Carol 🌻 (@CarolSaysThings)Fri, 31 Jul 2020 18:01 +0000

🤯

Peter Sciretta loves Star Wars (@PeterSciretta)Fri, 31 Jul 2020 06:50 +0000

https://twitter.com/WearyWithToil/status/1289137511328034816

JFC

🌱🌳🏠 (@WearyWithToil)Fri, 31 Jul 2020 09:56 +0000

I'm an ornithologist and actually I can confirm that birds don't need to flap their wings to fly, they only do it when humans are watching because they don't want to make us feel uncomfortable

Post details

When a camera’s frame rate is synced to a bird’s wings..

Buitengebieden (@buitengebieden_)Fri, 24 Jul 2020 22:19 +0000

Chris 🐝 (@cactusgrlx)Wed, 29 Jul 2020 21:52 +0000

Could someone please explain to cats that we wouldn't have to disturb them nearly as often if they didn't insist on sleeping directly on things we need

Holly Brockwell (@holly)Fri, 31 Jul 2020 14:59 +0000

My first order from the The Modern Persian kitchen arrived! Just in time for lunch 😋 Hoping this + Gousto are the answer to all my cooking/food woes.

Jenni Brown 🍉 (@madebyjenni)Fri, 31 Jul 2020 12:28 +0000

So to be clear I can't visit my sister's house for Eid biryani but I can meet her in the pub for a pint.

Shaf Choudry (@shaftag)Thu, 30 Jul 2020 21:40 +0000

Hacker News really great source of advice if you want tons of alternatives that completely disregard the situation, resources, and basically all constraints of the problem at hand.

Nick Craver (@Nick_Craver)Thu, 30 Jul 2020 23:49 +0000

The Super Mario Bros cover is such a venerable and respected internet meme and I can only hope to have done it justice 🙏

Samara Ginsberg (@samaracello)Fri, 31 Jul 2020 09:45 +0000

Post incident self care 🧖‍♀️✨

Carol 🌻 (@CarolSaysThings)Fri, 31 Jul 2020 10:45 +0000

Women who post programming jokes on Twitter are braver than anyone deserves

Sy Brand (@TartanLlama)Thu, 30 Jul 2020 21:47 +0000

I have just found out about the Sydney Annual Duck Fashion Show

Rachel (@rachellord22)Wed, 29 Jul 2020 13:06 +0000

Star Trek Minus Context (@NoContextTrek)Thu, 30 Jul 2020 13:59 +0000

One small word for man, one giant leap for me. Can you spot the difference? before: after:

Donna Amos 💗📚💻☕ (@donnacamos)Thu, 30 Jul 2020 19:58 +0000

What happens when you send a tweet in 2020

Muriel (@MurielComedy)Wed, 29 Jul 2020 12:51 +0000

Tired: Putting developers on call Wired: Drunk-dialing developers

Matt Stratton (@mattstratton)Thu, 30 Jul 2020 18:53 +0000

I really dislike the game werewolf. What things about your preferences disqualify you from tech?

Sara Ownbey Chipps (@SaraJChipps)Thu, 30 Jul 2020 16:42 +0000

Legit thought this was a devops post

Peter McConnell (@PeteMcConnell_)Wed, 29 Jul 2020 16:45 +0000

https://twitter.com/CuriousZelda/status/1288543207605907462

(2/2) With baited breath I looked today I got a shock 200k! I thank you all With all I've got Your great support It means a lot 🐾

Curious Zelda (@CuriousZelda)Wed, 29 Jul 2020 18:33 +0000

(1/2) Some years ago I found my place I wrote some words I shared my face I had no plan Expected nil But when we met I got a thrill I tweeted more I learnt to rhyme My following Began to climb...

Curious Zelda (@CuriousZelda)Wed, 29 Jul 2020 18:33 +0000

One of the best interview tips I've ever been given is, when asked: ❓'What is your expected salary?' respond with: ❔'What is your salary range for this role?'

Em 💫 (@britnorcodes)Thu, 30 Jul 2020 15:00 +0000

Monzo employees are called Monzonauts Now the rest of us are officially Alumnauts! 😍

eli schutze (@elibelly)Thu, 30 Jul 2020 13:49 +0000

https://twitter.com/23Chaos23/status/1288724996878028801

me: *posts a cute joke* some reply guy: "you should stop using this computing platform. I will not elaborate further." my dude, why on earth did you think that was a sensible response?

✨ Luna 🌙 (@lunasorcery)Thu, 30 Jul 2020 09:47 +0000

https://twitter.com/__apf__/status/1288566654452944896

Bezos: - Supposedly sells books but mostly keeps other shit on his bookshelves, kinda like Amazon

Adrienne Porter Felt (@__apf__)Wed, 29 Jul 2020 20:06 +0000

https://twitter.com/staidindoors/status/1288151931840368640

M.C. stands for Murder Capitalism

Cops are The KKK (@ZacharySGrigley)Wed, 29 Jul 2020 01:17 +0000

i never realized

staid indoors (@staidindoors)Tue, 28 Jul 2020 16:38 +0000

Anyway here's a picture of our cat and dog. They hate each other.

David Evans (@_davevans_)Wed, 29 Jul 2020 17:46 +0000

Now *this* is a mask! (found on Facebook)

Trev (@AntiSilence666)Wed, 29 Jul 2020 19:36 +0000