my cat has been ramming his head into my boobs a lot lately and i’ve read stories about how pets sometimes warn their owners of cancerous tumors using the same method so i went to the doctor and got checked and found out that my cat is just a pervert

anica (@hog_mild)Sat, 20 Mar 2021 22:28 GMT

“LSASS” is an extremely odd thing to keep hearing on a work call, when your name happens to be Elle.

the apocalypse, but make it fashion. ✨ (@ElleArmageddon)Mon, 22 Mar 2021 16:34 GMT

Really cool that the FSF has decided the past contributions of a dinosaur who's spent literal years openly abusing women without repercussions outweigh the potential contributions of all the women they just alienated by letting that man back into a position of power

Kat "it's probably a shitpost" Cosgrove (@Dixie3Flatline)Mon, 22 Mar 2021 16:41 GMT

This is amazing.

Dani Klein 🌎 YeahThatsKosher (@YeahThatsKosher)Sun, 21 Mar 2021 16:43 GMT

It's only [Obj]Light Cheese[Obj][Obj][Obj] if it comes from the [Obj] region of france, otherwise it's just unicode cheese

foone (@Foone)Mon, 22 Mar 2021 00:49 GMT

https://twitter.com/freezydorito/status/1373933024576991233

they should put plain clothes police officers clubbing inside that would do it

laura bananas (@freezydorito)Mon, 22 Mar 2021 09:43 GMT

if the bristol police didn’t want their vans to burn they shouldn’t leave them alone at night in the street being all flammable wearing provocative decals

laura bananas (@freezydorito)Mon, 22 Mar 2021 09:42 GMT

When I finish my Gü cheesecake

Ross Sayers (@Sayers33)Sun, 21 Mar 2021 13:35 GMT

I just learned about the CLI tool `grex`. It might change how I approach regular expressions (🤞🙈). You provide string values and it comes up with a regular expression matching them.😲 github.com/pemistahl/grex Video alt: CLI session showing multiple generated reg. expressions.

Stefan Judis (@stefanjudis)Sun, 21 Mar 2021 13:52 GMT

Exec 1: "The Mandalorian was a hit! We need something like that for the Obi Wan spinoff, but not -too- similar." Exec 2: "say no more"

Sam Sykes (@SamSykesSwears)Sun, 21 Mar 2021 16:54 GMT

Oh no

BAD♡GRRL (@BVDGRRL)Sun, 21 Mar 2021 10:24 GMT

Cats in boxes (@CatsInsideBox)Mon, 01 Mar 2021 22:46 GMT

thank you census for unwittingly providing a reaction image

Josefina 🧋(was @/kriemhildsrache) (@josefin_aut)Sat, 20 Mar 2021 21:15 GMT

$2000 became $1600. Biden promised to decriminalize marijuana, now he's firing staff who used it. You can see why I don't trust Democrats, right?

Al Sweigart (@AlSweigart)Sat, 20 Mar 2021 17:02 GMT

Because you want to see a man give water to a baby squirrel.

Danny Deraney (@DannyDeraney)Thu, 18 Mar 2021 18:50 GMT

this puppy playing with a butterfly is the cutest thing ever

Humor And Animals (@humorandanimals)Fri, 19 Mar 2021 15:00 GMT

My daughter is yr 6. Her school have said her class have missed out on a lot of school through Covid. They all need to 'catch up'. So next week, lessons are cancelled, its non unform, games, outdoor learning & camp fires. They're 'catching up' on making memories. Awesome.

Heather Fowler (@always_hope83)Fri, 19 Mar 2021 23:03 GMT

You ever think about how a woman will respond to unwanted advances by inventing a fictional man as a partner because other men are more likely to respect a fictitious man’s boundaries than the woman’s?

Cher (@cherthedev)Sat, 20 Mar 2021 13:11 GMT

Breakfast sandwich yummm

Jeff (@jeffr0)Sat, 20 Mar 2021 12:38 GMT

Jxvy (@Javi_Garras)Tue, 16 Mar 2021 11:14 GMT

tired and sad and angry and just about coping and missing my friends and gigs and festivals and clubs and parties and random nights out and "just one beer" after work and stumbling home and travelling and meeting people and trying a random place for dinner and being relaxed and

Euan Finlay (@efinlay24)Sat, 20 Mar 2021 01:33 GMT

🎉I have some exciting news to share! I'm Joining @getpostman to work on @jsonschema full time! 🤯 You can read our @opencollect update here: opencollective.com/json-schema/up… I. Am. Ecstatic!

Ben Hutton (@relequestual)Fri, 19 Mar 2021 13:39 GMT

do you ever get turned on editing your own nudes??? am i self obsessed??

ken 🌙 (@kickeep)Fri, 19 Mar 2021 16:57 GMT

https://twitter.com/Mothrabeams/status/1372959681925283843

Twitter this GOD DAMNED CROP

𝔐𝔬𝔱𝔥𝔯𝔞 ✨ (@Mothrabeams)Fri, 19 Mar 2021 17:16 GMT

If you have a tight space in your home office, the Webaround green screen works nicely. Got it this week, and it's already been a great enhancement to recording/streaming. 🎥🎙️🟩

Ben Greenberg (@RabbiGreenberg)Fri, 19 Mar 2021 10:41 GMT

I regret defaulting to “I’m married” when trying to stop unwanted engagement from a man. Subconsciously, I was appealing to the patriarchy. I should have just said stop. That also should be enough.

Natalie Davis (@codeFreedomRitr)Fri, 19 Mar 2021 03:07 GMT

Maybe you could go another whole round for me, hmm?💋 me as #MadMoxxi photoart @kmitenkova wig @NataZiron #Borderlands #Moxxi #cosplay @Borderlands @GearboxOfficial @DuvalMagic @2K_UK

Daria Rooz💋 (@dariarooz)Fri, 19 Mar 2021 15:41 GMT

https://twitter.com/SparkleClass/status/1372922150097727490

Including but not limited to: @inclusively_amy @JOETHECOLEMAN @jeremy_finck @StructuredSucc @sallypenni1 @mart_brooks @Axelisys @decolonisator @BytesDyslexia @jude_crazyjude @MC372 @EmilyyNics @evj @JamieTanna @wesley83 @Glo_Butterflies @StephanieKrus @MiradorDesign

Rachel Morgan-Trimmer (@SparkleClass)Fri, 19 Mar 2021 14:45 GMT

If *any* engineer screws up (not just juniors), use it as a chance to see where your processes, tools, docs, or training have let them down. Everyone makes mistakes. If the screw up has a big impact, that's arguably on the business for not mitigating the risk, not the individual

Post details

If a junior engineer screws up, make sure you tell them it's ok - we all make mistakes. Don't leave them sat at home feeling miserable during a pandemic

Jonty Wareing (@jonty)Thu, 18 Mar 2021 18:54 GMT

Sally Lait (@sallylait)Fri, 19 Mar 2021 08:38 GMT

When I'm mentoring, the biggest difficulty I'm seeing when engineers go from senior to higher level positions is about "measuring" their work. They get nervous (and I was too) that previous ways of measuring impact don't work anymore.

Jaana Dogan ヤナ ドガン (@rakyll)Thu, 18 Mar 2021 19:16 GMT

If a junior engineer screws up, make sure you tell them it's ok - we all make mistakes. Don't leave them sat at home feeling miserable during a pandemic

Jonty Wareing (@jonty)Thu, 18 Mar 2021 18:54 GMT

I’m still on Facebook mostly because I have a friend who runs a wildlife rescue and had to keep a bobcat that’s unreleasable because he was dropped on his head by a hawk as a kitten and doesn’t understand he’s a predator It’s an absolute Pixar movie. Fennel is his favorite toy.

Yell in a War (@jelenawoehr)Thu, 18 Mar 2021 19:20 GMT

Can confirm.

badly-drawn bee 🐝 (@soapachu)Thu, 18 Mar 2021 17:37 GMT