https://twitter.com/edent/status/1336751185638944773

FESTIVE UPDATE! My lockdown beard is now long enough for proper plaiting.

Terence Eden (@edent)Sat, 25 Dec 2021 11:57 GMT

Just before lockdown started, I had my beard trimmed. Today, it is now long enough to PLAIT. My plan to become a professional Beardfluencer ™ continues.

Terence Eden (@edent)Wed, 09 Dec 2020 19:14 GMT

Happy Christmas, friends! 🎄💛

A Christmas Carol 🎄 (@CarolSaysThings)Sat, 25 Dec 2021 12:19 GMT

Happy Holidays, folks. My wonderful wife made me and the puppy matching jumpers and it’s making me so happy 😍

Matt Brunt (@Brunty)Sat, 25 Dec 2021 12:19 GMT

Merry Christmas 🌲☃️🎅 how it how it’s started going

Richard Bradshaw (@FriendlyTester)Sat, 25 Dec 2021 12:17 GMT

You have been visited by disenfranchised Sean-ta Claus - may your Christmas be brighter than his was 😜 Merry Christmas to you all! 🎅

Sean M. Tracey (@seanmtracey)Sat, 25 Dec 2021 12:28 GMT

My mate’s cousin, Matt, is quite laterally a genius. Praise be to his lateral flow church…

David Levin (@davidlevin123)Sat, 25 Dec 2021 00:04 GMT

Merry Christmas Doom Scroll and all those who etch upon it!

Dj Walker-Morgan (@Codepope)Sat, 25 Dec 2021 10:38 GMT

When they talk about Santa in the news

Killian Sundermann (@killersundymann)Fri, 24 Dec 2021 17:40 GMT

RIP to the angels who didn’t make it to see the end of this year with us 🕊

DJ Kam Bennett (@KameronBennett)Fri, 24 Dec 2021 21:23 GMT

I think technically we’re living in precedented times again, in that I was also cutting my own hair at home at this point last year.

Josh Gondelman (@joshgondelman)Fri, 24 Dec 2021 22:37 GMT

https://twitter.com/WholesomeMeme/status/1474427399500664869

Thats what anxiety and depression feels like sometimes. Everything is great but you're on fire and trying to convince yourself everything is ok.. because it is, but you are just a mess.

Ⓜₐddₒₓ Ⓒᵣᵤᵢₛₑ😎 (@maddoxcruise)Sat, 25 Dec 2021 03:48 GMT

I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus isn't about adultery or about the dad dressing up as Santa, it's actually more of a consensual cuck/bull situation

j̴̢͘҉i̸̢͞z̛̛̀҉͞z̡͞w̶̵̢͜͞i̡͘t̸͝͝c̸͝h̀͏ (@fingerbIaster)Sat, 25 Dec 2021 04:03 GMT

dedicating this christmas to this iconic tweet

NEET volcel (@GASLIGHTER_)Fri, 24 Dec 2021 23:46 GMT

keeping someone from posting "the girl who tweeted this killed herself" is the only reason im still here

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dedicating this christmas to this iconic tweet

NEET volcel (@GASLIGHTER_)Fri, 24 Dec 2021 23:46 GMT

🐞 (@klssyourenemy)Fri, 24 Dec 2021 23:50 GMT

7yo was singing Deck the Halls and said "daily peril" instead of "gay apparel." Don we now our daily peril. 2021-22 in a nutshell, ladies and gentlemen. 🙄

Esther Duttweiler (@edutt88)Fri, 24 Dec 2021 04:31 GMT

'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the cloud, Not a server was stirring, not even a route! The pagers were placed by the bedside with care, While warning anyone that deploying THIS Friday beware!

swyx (@swyx)Sat, 25 Dec 2021 07:32 GMT

https://twitter.com/ElleArmageddon/status/1474512584304783360

If you’ve not harmed anyone, there’s nothing to feel shame over, and if you HAVE hurt someone, wallowing in shame is just holding you back from being accountable and actively working to do better. Shame doesn’t serve anyone.

the apocalypse, but make it fashion. ✨ (@ElleArmageddon)Fri, 24 Dec 2021 22:58 GMT

https://twitter.com/pati_gallardo/status/1474515822471225351

Maybe all colors look different to each of us? Maybe some people have excellent memory of past events, while I couldn’t tell you what I told you five minutes ago 😬 Maybe some people see and hear in fantastic detail in their minds, and some have nothing?

Patricia Aas 🐢 (@pati_gallardo)Fri, 24 Dec 2021 23:08 GMT

https://twitter.com/pati_gallardo/status/1474517369187979268

Maybe the color blue tastes like mint to this person or pop music looks like a carnival to another? Maybe some people have fantastic self soothing techniques, but they never tell anyone because they seem silly?

Patricia Aas 🐢 (@pati_gallardo)Fri, 24 Dec 2021 23:08 GMT

I sometimes wonder what it would be like to really experience living inside of someone else’s brain: - Wow, really? That’s what red looks like to you? And that’s what noise feels like? Oh wow, you feel like this too?? I thought I was weird to feel this way 😅

Patricia Aas 🐢 (@pati_gallardo)Fri, 24 Dec 2021 23:02 GMT

The festive urge to eat everything in sight

Jake Wright (@JakeWrightUK)Fri, 24 Dec 2021 23:25 GMT

I can confirm at 23:10 on Christmas Eve I have succeeded in whamageddon for the first year ever

Andy Bell (@hankchizljaw)Fri, 24 Dec 2021 23:09 GMT

https://twitter.com/hankchizljaw/status/1474517738936844293

I go the other way. Wham we’re such legends that they arranged for all of the royalties from Last Christmas go to various charities. Initially famine relief, then others. It is the anti-cash-in-christmas song. So the more I hear it, the happier it makes me. Also George Michael.

Phil Hawksworth (@philhawksworth)Fri, 24 Dec 2021 23:25 GMT

It's okay to not be okay, my friends. This is a hard time of the year. One holiday season seven years ago, I was suicidal. I bottled it all in. The holidays are tough. Talk to someone you can vent at. Just vent. It's all okay.

aaron ✊🏼 (@aaronbrazell)Fri, 24 Dec 2021 21:46 GMT

https://twitter.com/pixelatedboat/status/1474482898887581701

I will not be wishing a Merry Christmas to anyone in a “late Christmas” country - you made your choice

pixelatedboat aka “mr tweets” (@pixelatedboat)Fri, 24 Dec 2021 22:09 GMT

How was Storm Point and its magnificent creatures? Take a closer look at the animals in the official Apex Legends: Into The Wild nature documentary! Thank you everyone who submitted their animal encounters. #sponsoredbyEA

Timmy (@iiTzTimmy)Fri, 24 Dec 2021 01:19 GMT

2022 new meme format just dropped:

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got invited to an “alcohol-free christmas carol singalong”

wrecks (@oldredtree)Fri, 24 Dec 2021 21:50 GMT

gRegor Morrill (@gRegorLove)Fri, 24 Dec 2021 22:16 GMT

Two gentle reminders: 1. Everyone has different priorities.Some employers dont't give ppl a chance to learn new things on the job. They have to grow on their own time. And getting that next job is a priority. 2. Don't tell people how to spend their break. Peace!

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A lot of people in my timeline promoting programming, reading, taking courses, etc over the break. Stop the hustle culture.

ross. (@rossedman)Thu, 23 Dec 2021 16:31 GMT

Brian P. Hogan (@bphogan)Fri, 24 Dec 2021 22:15 GMT

Its not Christmas until Hans Gruber is pushed off a building for upsetting Emma Thompson #LoveToDieHardActually

FrimblesFarm 🐝🐕🌿🐓🐄🐖🐑🐐 (@FrimblesFarm)Thu, 23 Dec 2021 21:45 GMT

Or Hans Gruber will come get you whilst you sleep!

Michael Clarke (@Mr_Mike_Clarke)Fri, 17 Dec 2021 13:51 GMT

https://twitter.com/sophsweet/status/1352588390596812801

Hi Sophie, We've scrambled the media team (who had already left for the weekend) to discuss the use of the word Scramble in future tweets

RAF_Luton (@RAF_Luton)Fri, 22 Jan 2021 12:11 GMT

My mum just waited until the dog had walked out the room to tell me what she'd bought him for Christmas.

Louise Haigh (@LouHaigh)Thu, 23 Dec 2021 19:14 GMT

Flying home in 2 years, got my PCR test result today. My heart pumped as if I was checking a uni offer letter or a job-interview result. It's negative! ✈️🇹🇭

Tanin (@LandTanin)Fri, 24 Dec 2021 20:28 GMT

"Can you set the table please"

Stephen (@Stephenlough95)Fri, 24 Dec 2021 18:00 GMT

In case anyone wondered what a hedgehog getting an X-ray looked like

Dr. Longissimus (@DrLongissimus)Fri, 24 Dec 2021 07:22 GMT

https://twitter.com/DrLongissimus/status/1474279234239619087

I never thought anything would top this

Career Suicide Podcast (@RandomAssault)Fri, 24 Dec 2021 18:48 GMT

https://twitter.com/DrLongissimus/status/1474279234239619087

S. Cock Fitzgerald (@Fillup_3_Hotmen)Fri, 24 Dec 2021 19:47 GMT

https://twitter.com/Fillup_3_Hotmen/status/1474466733729660930

Iggy - ゴッド  (@Sinokei_)Fri, 24 Dec 2021 20:25 GMT

https://twitter.com/bradfitz/status/1474472230696325121

I started hitting them back - a lot of them were chinese and other foreign ASNs with strange ports open that would accept random connections 🤷🏻‍♀️

Kris Nóva (@krisnova)Fri, 24 Dec 2021 20:35 GMT

julietteyooo (@Julietteyooo)Fri, 24 Dec 2021 20:35 GMT

really wish i hadn’t dated so many generic looking white men. walking in the financial district is terrifying

mx. claus 🤶🏼 (@SamAllenX)Fri, 24 Dec 2021 20:16 GMT