Gotta admire the chutzpah of a conference talk attendee who passes gas, loudly I might add, during the talk without batting an eye

Jeremy, The Patronizing Saint of DevOps 🇺🇲🇺🇦 (@IAmJerdog)Tue, 05 Apr 2022 09:58 +0000

https://twitter.com/IAmJerdog/status/1511282109238939654

we haven't seen their like in a long time

Joe (@jna_sh)Tue, 05 Apr 2022 09:59 +0000

Worst commit messages, IMO: "resolving comments", "addressing feedback", "fixing up" EXPLAIN WHAT YOU DID AND WHY!

🇺🇦 (@Ocramius)Tue, 05 Apr 2022 09:57 +0000

🧠 Reminder that "beefstew" is not a good password. It is not Str0g4|\|off

Chris Heilmann (@codepo8)Tue, 05 Apr 2022 08:57 +0000

Some guy interviewing me just called me a junior developer based on my skills and told me "software is not for me" while smirking. How is your Monday going?

Anna (@annarages)Mon, 04 Apr 2022 19:23 +0000

Coke switched to plastic bottles not because consumers wanted it ( we all used to take bottles back to the shops lol) but because they figured that disposable plastic was cheaper than maintaining the bottle collection system

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The world is not addicted to plastic. People don't buy products in plastic packages because they just can't get enough plastic, they buy them because there's no other choice. Corporations are addicted to plastic, and governments are addicted to not regulating corporations.

twitter.com/globalnews/sta…

Mary Gillis (@living_marble)Thu, 31 Mar 2022 14:59 +0000

mumbi (@pasrealiste)Fri, 01 Apr 2022 17:55 +0000

The world is not addicted to plastic. People don't buy products in plastic packages because they just can't get enough plastic, they buy them because there's no other choice. Corporations are addicted to plastic, and governments are addicted to not regulating corporations.

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The world is addicted to plastic. To address the problem, researchers are turning to some unlikely substances: the roots of mushrooms, and byproducts from wheat and lentil production, to create bioplastics. Read more: globalnews.ca/news/8707787/h…

Globalnews.ca (@globalnews)Wed, 30 Mar 2022 17:34 +0000

Mary Gillis (@living_marble)Thu, 31 Mar 2022 14:59 +0000

Just in case there's anyone else out there who hasn't seen this work of genius. Keep an eye on that counter in the bottom right as you scroll down. web3isgoinggreat.com

Brandur (@brandur)Mon, 04 Apr 2022 20:28 +0000

i don't really like the word 'TERF' because it implies that these people are still somehow feminists at all

Violet Valentine (@slutpilled)Mon, 04 Apr 2022 18:44 +0000

Convert go test output to junit xml. Contribute to jstemmer/go-junit-report development by creating an account on GitHub.

LOL. Louis CK WON A GRAMMY TONIGHT. And everyone who was so loud about Will smith, so immediately, last weekend is suddenly giving us 🦗🦗🦗🦗. 👀

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I’m actually too disgusted to even talk about it anymore. I’m done. But the next time a white person slaps someone or more… We will *All* be watching how all of you react and for how long.

Jameela Jamil 🌈 (@jameelajamil)Sat, 02 Apr 2022 05:42 +0000

Jameela Jamil 🌈 (@jameelajamil)Mon, 04 Apr 2022 18:17 +0000

Writing a conference talk for the first time in... forever. It'll be all about how you can improve the technical interview process at your company and give every candidate a great experience. It'll be my first talk since having a baby! And since moving to Stockholm in 2020 💁‍♀️

Emma Bostian (@EmmaBostian)Mon, 04 Apr 2022 14:34 +0000

My friend got a kitten two weeks ago and he told my toddler about it and for two weeks Es been saying “Meet Rocky? Tiny cat”. We went to see Rocky today and he carried a treat in his hand the whole car ride there saying, “Rocky will love this” and guess what Rocky DID.

Lucy Huber (@clhubes)Mon, 04 Apr 2022 01:11 +0000

Smoke sesh at the playstation jacuzzi

lucy (@LUCYBackstreet)Sat, 02 Apr 2022 22:44 +0000

We saw a tweet recently that said ‘starting a job feels like you’re a new character on the ninth season of a tv show.’ If you’ve ever related to this, you’re not the only one! Starting a new job can bring up all sorts of feelings; excitement, doubt, joy, and fear to name a few.

Making Monzo (@MakingMonzo)Mon, 04 Apr 2022 14:54 +0000

Companies- Why can’t we find anyone to hire? Their hiring process-

Adam Karpiak (@Adam_Karpiak)Mon, 04 Apr 2022 14:48 +0000

Will Smith has already received more consequences to his actions than Kyle Rittenhouse has.

✊🏿✊🏾✊🏽✊🏼 Dr. Woke ذذفة الثلج (@SnowflakeWoke)Sun, 03 Apr 2022 00:38 +0000

are we living through traumatic event after traumatic event or are we just the first generation with worldwide communication and social media and life has actually always been this fucking horrific?

dove 🕊 (@lovedoveclarke)Mon, 04 Apr 2022 04:09 +0000

Telling me that the A in LGBTQIA+ stands for ally is one of the quickest ways to let me know that you aren't one.

Emma 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈♿ (@theEmmagination)Sat, 02 Apr 2022 20:43 +0000

If you don’t get good vibes from watching this I feel really earnestly sorry for you twitter.com/offtheraiis/st…

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Dude what is it with this trend? Trying to get women?

ᴡᴇϟ (@offtheraiIs)Sat, 02 Apr 2022 19:57 +0000

isi baehr-breen (its pronounced ‘izzy’) (@isaiah_bb)Mon, 04 Apr 2022 14:06 +0000

the real winner of april fools day

PCSpecialist (@PCSpecialist)Mon, 04 Apr 2022 11:09 +0000

https://twitter.com/urlichsanais/status/1510937627037515777

Is the source for the tool available? That's where open source ends.

Alistair Hey (@alistair_hey)Mon, 04 Apr 2022 11:39 +0000

so mad to me that no billionaire has ever been like.. i’m going to do it. i’m going to fundamentally change the world for the good of the people. just the biggest flex in human history. but no they’re like okay go to space, paper over the cracks, & chill out until the oceans boil

Beth McColl (@imteddybless)Sat, 02 Apr 2022 18:22 +0000

https://twitter.com/myumyulovemyu/status/1510589466926522371

抱えてベッドに移動してあげる。そのまま爆睡し続けるボンボン。。

もも　と　みらい (@myumyulovemyu)Sun, 03 Apr 2022 12:09 +0000

Kharkiv’s zoo is being evacuated and this footage of tapirs in transit might be the best video I’ve seen in weeks.

Kevin Rothrock (@KevinRothrock)Sat, 02 Apr 2022 17:35 +0000

Every so often, I help to make a small difference ☺ "There is an expectation that government software and code is open-source by default. This means it should be developed in the open and published using an Open Source Initiative approved licence." gov.uk/government/pub…

Terence Eden (@edent)Mon, 04 Apr 2022 07:45 +0000

https://twitter.com/june_inez/status/1510606207110848522

You do realize that cis people have pronouns too, right? I’m a cis woman and I have pronouns of her/she.

ToriBell (@frocksoffantasy)Sun, 03 Apr 2022 23:56 +0000

What’s worse for our mental health, wearing masks or knowing that 90% of everyone around you doesn’t care if you die.

Zoe Whittall (@zoewhittall)Sun, 03 Apr 2022 15:55 +0000

Nobody: What’s your favorite paradox? Me: If you ask Rick Astley for his copy of the movie UP, he cannot give it to you as he will never give you up. However, in doing so, he lets you down. Thus creating the Astley Paradox.

Alenora (@spunkyturnip)Sun, 28 Jun 2020 17:04 +0000

guy: I … just … don’t know what type of guy I am therapist: that’s okay! that’s what the wheel is for

monstera adansonii (@yournerdyfriend)Sun, 03 Apr 2022 17:08 +0000

Why do i have to sign in to a website to scan a document from my scanner that is attached via USB to my computer

Emily G (@EmilyGorcenski)Sun, 03 Apr 2022 20:57 +0000

https://twitter.com/emilyst/status/1510714008726294534

not a single reply telling me to "full stop" smh

Emily 🌦 (@emilyst)Sun, 03 Apr 2022 21:11 +0000

https://twitter.com/emilyst/status/1510713419980177410

i am so sorry

Emily 🌦 (@emilyst)Sun, 03 Apr 2022 20:18 +0000

https://twitter.com/emilyst/status/1510713472568356864

anyways, here's hoping all your periods are *punctual*

Emily 🌦 (@emilyst)Sun, 03 Apr 2022 20:21 +0000

bleeding from your vagina? that’s a period. bleeding from your anus? that’s a colon.

Emily 🌦 (@emilyst)Sun, 03 Apr 2022 20:18 +0000

Happy little dumpster fires…

Chris Short (He/Him/His) 🇺🇸🇺🇦 (@ChrisShort)Sun, 03 Apr 2022 14:02 +0000

⭐️ I wrote another thing! ⭐️ It's a markdown transformer that converts a web address into a beautiful website preview, much like Twitter does. It's built on @kentcdodds remark-embedder/core and uses @selbekk Open Graph Ninja API cc: @MichaelDeBoey93 github.com/donavon/transf…

west, donavon west | jsmerch.dev (@donavon)Sun, 03 Apr 2022 13:45 +0000

all cats are just little babies, regardless of age

Kat Cosgrove (@Dixie3Flatline)Sun, 03 Apr 2022 14:11 +0000

Well Kevin just escaped from my garden. Scariest moment of my life- I live on a main road! The boy really just dug under my fence and went “I’m freeee” Luckily I caught him after doing a, quite frankly amazing power dive but I do not need this kind of adrenaline in my life

Laura J Hyatt (@LauraJHyatt)Sun, 03 Apr 2022 13:08 +0000

I promise that if you want people to know about an atrocity that's happened, you can do so without sharing pictures of dead bodies on the TL with thousands of people 💞

Cara (@caraesten)Sun, 03 Apr 2022 14:30 +0000