i wish more people would understand that people are more efficient at 70% capacity than 110%

v korbes (@veekorbes)Fri, 08 Apr 2022 17:20 +0000

if you just give the tiktok voice a long string of random words it breaks them up into these short phrases that have perfect clickbait cadence

fruit goes beep (@scanlime)Fri, 08 Apr 2022 04:37 +0000

🏳️‍⚧️💙 Natalie ... xx (@Nat_itsme_uk)Thu, 07 Apr 2022 14:56 +0000

Let’s clarify one thing: not believing that the pandemic has ended when facts clearly tell you it hasn’t ended is not called ‘covid anxiety’.

Dr Nisreen Alwan 🌻 (@Dr2NisreenAlwan)Fri, 10 Sep 2021 13:42 +0000

https://twitter.com/Julietteyooo/status/1512539913262022657

LMFAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

julietteyooo (@Julietteyooo)Fri, 08 Apr 2022 21:18 +0000

Don’t forget to gas light ur man today 🙏

julietteyooo (@Julietteyooo)Fri, 08 Apr 2022 21:16 +0000

cats being weird little guys (@weirdlilguys)Fri, 25 Mar 2022 14:51 GMT

I wish ppl come with a 30 sec trailer so I can see what I’m getting myself into.

SIE (@_badassiee)Fri, 08 Apr 2022 01:34 +0000

A few people just told me my glasses are too expensive… they’re on sale for $10.00 though. I’m not sure how much “cheaper” y’all expect me to sell premium wine glasses for 😭 Now I’m questioning myself.. is $10.00 to much?

Tay (@iles__)Thu, 07 Apr 2022 22:55 +0000

https://twitter.com/iles__/status/1512202397761904644

even if you weren’t the one bussin your ass in your garage making the glasses, $10 is extremely reasonable. a friend of my mother’s daughter actually DOES & she charges $200 a set of 6 (for a basic glass shape). if you don’t hike that shit back up to $20 😆 shit, CHARGE MORE; $35

𝕷𝖚𝖓𝖆 𝕷𝖊𝖁𝖎𝖊𝖌𝖊 (@LunaLeViege)Fri, 08 Apr 2022 11:08 +0000

https://twitter.com/codyghosthost/status/1511773908365725699

War Fries (mayonaise, peanut sauce and little chopped onions)

Underworld666⚒ (@Underworld66681)Thu, 07 Apr 2022 03:49 +0000

https://twitter.com/codyghosthost/status/1511773908365725699

I prefer fries with my ketchup to be honest.

M (@MM57135944)Fri, 08 Apr 2022 00:38 +0000

linux clipboards are great if you want your OS to gaslight you you have a text file open, you hit paste, it pasts "foo" you select "bar", hit cut, "bar" disappears you hit paste, "foo" appears where did bar go why is foo still here

foone (@Foone)Fri, 08 Apr 2022 16:24 +0000

I am SCREAMING

Della Reese’s Pieces. (@LaVidaYeauxduh)Thu, 07 Apr 2022 21:55 +0000

John Wick 4 and that choice wasn’t even hard twitter.com/discussingfilm…

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These films have all been pushed to 2023. If you could choose, which would you see first? - 'Aquaman and the Lost Kingdom' - 'John Wick: Chapter 4' - 'The Flash' - 'Transformers: Rise of the Beasts' See what other release dates have recently changed: bit.ly/Dates2022

DiscussingFilm (@DiscussingFilm)Fri, 08 Apr 2022 16:56 +0000

Lewis (Taylor’s Version) (@lpowell092020)Fri, 08 Apr 2022 17:33 +0000

https://twitter.com/MRiverlife/status/1401527926416416772

I can't imagine today's boomers doing it, all y'all do is buy commemorative Trump teddy bears & post "how to open PDF" as a facebook status

Hot Take Appreciator (@IHateNYT)Mon, 07 Jun 2021 06:07 +0000

company messages to me as IC: "sorry, you don't have X years of experience in [very specific thing] so we are less interested" company messages to me as a line manager: "who cares if you have no experience in product eng? managers are managers! come manage our product eng team!"

kf (@kf)Fri, 08 Apr 2022 17:55 +0000

What I realized from the last couple of weeks is: live your life as if it were your last month on this Earth. 💔

Johan Bové (@johanbove)Fri, 08 Apr 2022 20:32 +0000

is there anything more truly legendary than winning an Oscar for best actor and immediately afterwards being banned from them for a decade?

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Will Smith receives 10-year ban from Oscars. thefader.com/2022/04/08/wil…

The FADER (@thefader)Fri, 08 Apr 2022 19:56 +0000

Cara (@caraesten)Fri, 08 Apr 2022 20:31 +0000

https://twitter.com/caraesten/status/1512528681243013124

obviously this is an unjust decision but wow incredible energy

Cara (@caraesten)Fri, 08 Apr 2022 20:32 +0000

i find these discussions pointless because everyone's using different definitions, and title inflation is bonkers. how would you compare levels/titles across these three companies? what's the point of quibbling over the meaning of senior when this is what ladders look like?

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How many years of experience do you need to be a senior software senior engineer?

David Fowler 🇧🇧🇺🇸 (@davidfowl)Fri, 08 Apr 2022 00:49 +0000

amy nguyen (@amyngyn)Fri, 08 Apr 2022 14:01 +0000

The new Lego® Star Wars™ game has an @eddieizzard Death Star Canteen reference. Day made 💖

Jan Lehnardt (@janl)Fri, 08 Apr 2022 18:09 +0000

while i slept in, my mom found my cleaning supplies, watered my plant and trimmed it, made a ton of mom food, and figured out how to turn on my robot vacuum. yesterday's disrespect will be overlooked

amy nguyen (@amyngyn)Fri, 08 Apr 2022 18:11 +0000

hello ladies, dudes, gentlethems, and droids much love from your ol’ pal prune face

rstevens 🐳💨 (@rstevens)Fri, 08 Apr 2022 18:15 +0000

TIL zgrep(1) is a shell script. BSD basically does “zcat | grep”, but GNU does “gzip -dc | sed”. How did I learn that? The fun way! CVE-2022-1271, arbitrary-file-write _and_ code execution vulnerability in GNU zgrep / gzip. openwall.com/lists/oss-secu…

Jan Schaumann (@jschauma)Fri, 08 Apr 2022 13:30 +0000

please remember that your dog needs Friday treatos

Ned Pyle (@NerdPyle)Fri, 08 Apr 2022 16:21 +0000

We're cancelling each other over our nut videos with the sound on today. Post a clip of your most cancellable nut video with the sound on—

marina 🕊☭ 4/7 🎂 (@marinaxdove)Fri, 08 Apr 2022 03:51 +0000

If you don't want to use plain bullets, the ::marker psuedo-element is for you!

They/Them Pronouns Suddenly Easy for Person Misgendering Trans Woman: ow.ly/kR3150IEprq

Reductress (@Reductress)Fri, 08 Apr 2022 16:01 +0000

does ur bf know ur out here posting how much you hate having sex with him for the serotonin high of a viral tweet.

marina 🕊☭ 4/7 🎂 (@marinaxdove)Fri, 08 Apr 2022 16:06 +0000

https://twitter.com/joss_prior/status/1512451189040087041

Show them this graph. If people learn more about trans issues they're more likely to support

Katy Montgomerie 🦖🦕 (@KatyMontgomerie)Fri, 08 Apr 2022 15:57 +0000

https://twitter.com/Calmarkel/status/1512348919031865344

Why is this one the only one on the thread with an NSFW tag lmao

Commie with an iPhone (@FatandBlasted)Fri, 08 Apr 2022 13:24 +0000

https://twitter.com/JoshuaKGoldberg/status/1512210604681048075

As an exercise: every time you get a production bug, see if the bug could have been prevented with better types. I've found this is true more often than not.

Daniel Brain (@bluepnume)Fri, 08 Apr 2022 03:56 +0000

I have converted dozens of projects to TypeScript at this point, and in *every single one* there have been multiple bugs found as a result. Every! Single! One!

Josh Goldberg 💖 (@JoshuaKGoldberg)Thu, 07 Apr 2022 23:27 +0000

we're cancelling each other over pictures of juicy jugs today. Share your most cancellable titty pics.

chingy nea 『フィート•たけし』 (@TheGayChingy)Thu, 07 Apr 2022 19:51 +0000

I regularly review code written by senior developers who reject typescript, and am always finding small bugs that tsc would've pointed out, like missing required arguments, code that expects one type but receives another, heck, even dead code. twitter.com/joshuakgoldber…

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I have converted dozens of projects to TypeScript at this point, and in *every single one* there have been multiple bugs found as a result. Every! Single! One!

Josh Goldberg 💖 (@JoshuaKGoldberg)Thu, 07 Apr 2022 23:27 +0000

Emelia 👸🏻 • 💙💛 (@ThisIsMissEm)Fri, 08 Apr 2022 16:20 +0000

Apparently the Buffalo Wild Wings online ordering platform has a base64-encoded list of words it won't accept The list is... interesting

Karl (@supersat)Thu, 07 Apr 2022 18:19 +0000

Okay, who's searching for porn on a buffalo wings ordering website? You do realise this ain't @pornhub and they look differently right??

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https://twitter.com/foosecn00b/status/1512135604112306178

Karl (@supersat)Thu, 07 Apr 2022 19:29 +0000

Emelia 👸🏻 • 💙💛 (@ThisIsMissEm)Fri, 08 Apr 2022 16:22 +0000

https://twitter.com/foosecn00b/status/1512135604112306178

Karl (@supersat)Thu, 07 Apr 2022 19:29 +0000

“I’m not sure I fancy anything in the fridge” - Translation: We’re having a takeaway and we both knew it long ago.

VeryBritishProblems (@SoVeryBritish)Fri, 08 Apr 2022 16:24 +0000

For each “no kink at pride” take I see I will be leading another puppy girl around on a leash at pride

milf twink (@SamAllenX)Fri, 08 Apr 2022 16:24 +0000

The fact that I've avoided seeing the full bowling ball gif till now does make me a bit proud

j 🌬️ (@silvergelpen)Fri, 08 Apr 2022 12:22 +0000