If Twitter crashes and you need to find me, the hell you will. I've got a two day head start on you, which is more than I need. I speak a dozen languages, know every local custom, I'll blend in, disappear, you'll never see me again.

Peter🌲Brannen (@PeterBrannen1)Fri, 18 Nov 2022 02:41 GMT

my crowning achievement is on this app is probably making Gandalf big naturals in photoshop when I was recovering from anesthesia and watching him spread across the world :,) I’m glad the concept of Gandalf with huge titties touched everyone hearts as much as it has mine!

becca t 🌞 (@beccateeth)Fri, 18 Nov 2022 23:43 GMT

I spent the last day talking to smart folks who know Elon to try to grok why it feels capricious and what the method is to the seeming madness. Here you are for those who care and for those who don’t, good for you for ignoring chaos monkeys nytimes.com/2022/11/18/tec…

Kara Swisher (@karaswisher)Sat, 19 Nov 2022 14:14 GMT

It's my birthday! Therefore it marks the end of another year of me hurtling around Earth's yellow sun. So, as is customary, here's my year in review. You can read previous years at 2021, 2020, 2019, …

Wow, remember when Twitter didn't linkify everything, including actual websites?

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http://bhami.com/rosetta.html # Rosetta Stone for Unix. Really cool table of how to do things in different versions of Unix.

Command Line Magic (@climagic)Fri, 29 Jul 2011 14:37 +0000

Command Line Magic (@climagic)Sat, 19 Nov 2022 13:11 GMT

The best use of technology is to improve quality of life. Watch people’s beautiful first expressions of hearing sounds for the first time.

Vala Afshar (@ValaAfshar)Thu, 17 Nov 2022 15:54 GMT

Whenever I open twitter now, the home timeline has like 2 new tweets. I'm not sure if this is because the twitter infrastructure is failing, or because actually there was one person individually …

You should not require a direct connection to a marginalised group to care about their safety or rights. You should care because it’s not acceptable. If you didn’t have daughters, would you care less? thetimes.co.uk/article/daught…

Sheree Atcheson #DemandingMore OUT NOW📙 (@nirushika)Sat, 19 Nov 2022 11:21 GMT

I've stopped procrastinating (#ADHD) and finally got myself on Mastodon @codefoodpixels@indieweb.social indieweb.social/@codefoodpixels

CodeFoodPixels@indieweb.social (@CodeFoodPixels)Sat, 19 Nov 2022 11:06 GMT

https://twitter.com/simonw/status/1593679524775882752

The absolutely worst part of the onboarding is when you are asked to pick a server, when you still don't have any idea what the consequences of that decision are Start with a server that your friends are on already and that's still open to signups You can move elsewhere later

Simon Willison (@simonw)Fri, 18 Nov 2022 18:59 GMT

Mastodon has a steep initial learning curve You're smart. You can read, and Google things, and ask questions You can do this!

Simon Willison (@simonw)Fri, 18 Nov 2022 18:56 GMT

[INT. STARBUCKS - DAY] Me: Theres a large rat in the bathroom Barista: ? Me: A large rat Barista: ? Me: THERES A VENTI RAT IN THE BATHROOM

parodave 🎤🦆 (@hurlarious)Mon, 07 Sep 2015 23:55 +0000

How could have have a conversation with your tongue glued to all those boots though?

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I'd like to talk to Trump on podcast. Make it a tough, raw, honest conversation. Maybe it'll help Twitter decide if to bring him back.

Lex Fridman (@lexfridman)Fri, 18 Nov 2022 20:09 GMT

Twіtter API (real, not parody) (@fake_api)Sat, 19 Nov 2022 07:50 GMT

Oh OK so just focus on everything we’re already doing. Cool, thanks, glad we have people like providing these incredible ideas to Elon. No way we would’ve ever come up with these thoughts on our own.

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https://twitter.com/elonmusk/status/1593659832552153093

Focus on engineering. Improve: - Catching bots - Ads recommendation - Intuitive edit button - Video/audio content hosting - Monetization for creators - Search and discovery of content - Smarter comment ordering I have opinions on what's most important, but don't know details.

Lex Fridman (@lexfridman)Fri, 18 Nov 2022 17:52 GMT

Twіtter API (real, not parody) (@fake_api)Sat, 19 Nov 2022 07:49 GMT

https://twitter.com/ReinH/status/1593874403825446913

elon is doing many things on the rationale that he is a joke so they must be legal

Senior Oops Engineer (@ReinH)Sat, 19 Nov 2022 07:53 GMT

This wasn't just a hell site, it was a hell home

heather (@lollyrots)Fri, 18 Nov 2022 01:02 GMT

W H A T

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If you're gonna get on Mastodon, I would like to apologise in advance for being the guy responsible for posts being called "Toots". I thought it was funny. And it is, and it's even funnier that some people hate it. I take it back, I'm not sorry. Ha ha. Toots.

Hbomberguy (@Hbomberguy)Fri, 18 Nov 2022 01:23 GMT

Laura Shortridge-Scott 🐈💙🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿 (@DiscordianKitty)Fri, 18 Nov 2022 10:43 GMT

In this organisation, women's median hourly pay is 4.1% lower than men's.

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To celebrate #internationalmensday, here are some of our amazing men. Whether you're in the hospice, our shops or the community, we want to say a huge thank you. You're making the difference when it matters the most and we couldn’t do, what we do without you. 💙💜 #IMD2022

Keech Hospice Care (@KeechHospice)Sat, 19 Nov 2022 08:00 GMT

Gender Pay Gap Bot (@PayGapApp)Sat, 19 Nov 2022 08:10 GMT

I've seen a lot of people asking "why does everyone think Twitter is doomed?" As an SRE and sysadmin with 10+ years of industry experience, I wanted to write up a few scenarios that are real threats to the integrity of the bird site over the coming weeks.

Mosquito Capital (@MosquitoCapital)Fri, 18 Nov 2022 09:46 GMT

Mastodon is a train wreck. Someone needs to build a twitter clone… nothing fancy, just like twitter and allow you to grab your twitter handle. I know python, I'll see what I can whip up this weekend. According to Musk it's not that hard and doesn't take a lot of people.

Ron Gilbert (@grumpygamer)Thu, 17 Nov 2022 22:04 GMT

What with the twitter main character and the *other* main character I’ve had it up to here with narcissists and psychopaths. I feel like my brain needs a good scrubbing.

Cassie Evans (@cassiecodes)Sat, 19 Nov 2022 09:34 GMT

https://twitter.com/cassiecodes/status/1593895134911164416

His tweet was deleted.

Mike Raistrick (@m_raistr)Sat, 19 Nov 2022 10:08 GMT

If you're curious why everyone seems so mad about the modern frontends live débâcle - this was the *entire* "3,500 person" conference. Which sponsors paid ten grand at least for stands at, and speakers paid for their own international flights and accomodation to speak at.

David Whitney (@david_whitney)Sat, 19 Nov 2022 09:55 GMT

https://twitter.com/cassiecodes/status/1593675948410507266

Hang on, this is Gen Ashley of Women Who Code Gen Ashley?? Fucking hell.

Charlie O’Hara (@whalecoiner)Sat, 19 Nov 2022 00:53 GMT

Software Engineers 20-25: gotta get a job gotta get a job gotta get a job 25-29: gotta get promoted gotta get promoted gotta get promoted 30: makes their own pickles

malice ghoulpus (@alicegoldfuss)Thu, 16 Jan 2020 17:27 GMT

Before it all ends, I just want you to know this is the best tweet that’s been tweeted

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Software Engineers 20-25: gotta get a job gotta get a job gotta get a job 25-29: gotta get promoted gotta get promoted gotta get promoted 30: makes their own pickles

malice ghoulpus (@alicegoldfuss)Thu, 16 Jan 2020 17:27 GMT

Sarah Drasner (@sarah_edo)Sat, 19 Nov 2022 03:06 GMT

The Twitter meltdown is distracting me from fully enjoying the FTX meltdown.

matt blaze (@mattblaze)Fri, 18 Nov 2022 16:49 GMT

https://twitter.com/elonmusk/status/1593767953706921985

Come advertise with us, the site that allows a former president free reign to do all kinds of incitement

James Felton (@JimMFelton)Sat, 19 Nov 2022 06:38 GMT

People who need IT support from their children every Thanksgiving because they can't print anymore keep asking why Twitter won't just keep running with no employees.

Marco Rogers (@polotek)Fri, 18 Nov 2022 17:47 GMT

https://twitter.com/AndreMaillho/status/1593771193865322497

Hahahaha

Make Lies Wrong Again (Some Knucklehead) (@TheBoltUpright)Sat, 19 Nov 2022 01:06 GMT

I was up til 3am. I am a mess. I’ve never experienced something this dark and worrying in my life. Again, encouraging anyone who’s messaged me to speak up publicly if they can.

Cassie Evans (@cassiecodes)Sat, 19 Nov 2022 08:47 GMT

https://twitter.com/cassiecodes/status/1593690761798848514

I don't have a 'network' I have friends. I have community. I will not stand for you bullying them.

Cassie Evans (@cassiecodes)Fri, 18 Nov 2022 19:42 GMT

She's contacted the CEO of someone's workplace to get them to stop tweeting about the event so please be cautious about sharing this if this could negatively affect your employment. Gen - I can go all day mate. Try me.

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One of my friends spoke out about her experience with Modern Frontends. I have some things to say too. It seems like a lot of people do. cassie.codes/posts/modern-f…

Cassie Evans (@cassiecodes)Fri, 18 Nov 2022 18:42 GMT

Cassie Evans (@cassiecodes)Fri, 18 Nov 2022 19:41 GMT

https://twitter.com/cassiecodes/status/1593691766250610688

This tracks directly with everything people have told me so far. I'm not even slightly surprised.

Cassie Evans (@cassiecodes)Fri, 18 Nov 2022 19:51 GMT

Idk man, last time he was here this platform was used to incite an insurrection, multiple people died, the Vice President of the United States was nearly assassinated, and hundreds were injured but I guess that’s not enough for you to answer the question. Twitter poll it is twitter.com/elonmusk/statu…

Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (@AOC)Sat, 19 Nov 2022 02:15 GMT

oh my god I was just checking my search results and I'm in the top 5 google results for buttblug time to mark that off the bucket list

buttplug.io 🍑🔌 - Open Source Sex Tech (@buttplugio)Sat, 19 Nov 2022 07:04 GMT

In all my years I've never seen SWers trending on civvie twitter. Not during FOSTA, Stormy Daniels, none of it. I am beside myself.

☂️Melissa "Missy" Mariposa☂️ (@ingodwetryst)Sat, 19 Nov 2022 04:31 GMT

i would simply have my lead pokémon auto battle all 40–50 feral hogs

eevee (parody) ❎ (@eevee)Sat, 19 Nov 2022 07:20 GMT

Social media has long been sneered at by “hardcore engineers” since before social media was a term. It was a dynamic at Google versus Blogger. The challenges of building systems that amplify human weirdness and wonder as distinct from search, commerce, cars just never computes.

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Let me suggest the contempt in that second tweet - “please, surely he can manage a social network” - is a big part of why he’s very visibly failing at managing this social network.

Will Stancil (@whstancil)Wed, 16 Nov 2022 13:25 GMT

Jason Goldman (@goldman)Wed, 16 Nov 2022 15:31 GMT

EXTREMELY THIS. speaking of google, you know why that company, full of “hardcore engineers” since its inception, has failed at no fewer than 4 major attempts at social media? because you need to understand people as deeply as you understand computers to be successful at them.

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Social media has long been sneered at by “hardcore engineers” since before social media was a term. It was a dynamic at Google versus Blogger. The challenges of building systems that amplify human weirdness and wonder as distinct from search, commerce, cars just never computes. twitter.com/whstancil/stat…

Jason Goldman (@goldman)Wed, 16 Nov 2022 15:31 GMT

EricaJoy (@EricaJoy)Wed, 16 Nov 2022 15:43 GMT

Jason Mantzoukas is Mr. D / Dionysus In #PercyJackson & The Olympians ⚡️ “Self-described as “100% Greek,” Jason is the perfect guy to inhabit everyone’s favorite grumpy wine god and head of camp, Dionysus. He’s also an accomplished jazz drummer!” - Rick Riordan.

Percy Jackson News 🔱 (@updatespercy)Thu, 02 Jun 2022 18:07 +0000

Gotta say, Mantzoukas as Dionysus is an incredible casting for this series.

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Jason Mantzoukas is Mr. D / Dionysus In #PercyJackson & The Olympians ⚡️ “Self-described as “100% Greek,” Jason is the perfect guy to inhabit everyone’s favorite grumpy wine god and head of camp, Dionysus. He’s also an accomplished jazz drummer!” - Rick Riordan.

Percy Jackson News 🔱 (@updatespercy)Thu, 02 Jun 2022 18:07 +0000

Classical Studies Memes for Hellenistic Teens (@CSMFHT)Sat, 19 Nov 2022 07:27 GMT

BREAKING: Twitter just laid off 90% of their indexes. Sources confirm the remaining SQL queries just have to be more hardcore

Lukas Eder (@lukaseder)Fri, 18 Nov 2022 07:43 GMT

I used to use Goodreads for tracking/reviewing books I’ve read. Then Amazon bought them and I decided to move all that stuff to my own blog. This is how I did it! #indieweb #ownyourdata